Orientation is different from Preference as well as Identity
Many people have issues understanding these differences due to the binary preconception of the human sexuality.
I find that using the Genderbread Person (for us and for others) helps to explain better what is the difference, and why there are so many combinations (as the colours of the rainbow – see what I did here? *wink*)
So you have four different areas to express one’s identity:
- Gender Identity
- Gender Expression
- Anatomical Sex
- Sexual Orientation
All of these in a Cis-gender, Heterosexual person point toward binary understanding, but it doesn’t explain why cis-genders are attracted to same-sex people (now you have a variant and Gay/Queer appears.) You then add how you express yourself (regardless of your anatomical sex, being that primary or secondary characteristics) etc…
Head to this website to get a much more in depth explanation that will help you more and also listen to (and maybe follow) Blaire White having an incredible and civilized conversation with Ben Shapiro (he’s an interesting fellow because of what he says and how he talks about those topics):
After Twitter went into an uproar after Ben’s appearance on the Rubin Report where they discussed pronouns and myself, I decided to reach out and have a civil conversation with him.
I hope all these resources help you, and of course I would be more than happy to keep the conversation opened