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Explaining to my young son

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Posts: 6
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(@josiej111)
Active Member     United States of America, California, Orange County
Joined: 4 years ago

Hoping to find other families with young children who have navigated this issue.

my 5 year old reacted not super well to my presentation and my in-laws got involved when he visited them and everyone frames it as a “problem” that they need to solve, including my wife much of the time (I.e. that I should not transition but need mental health help and/or antidepressants, or “God” and “Religion” so I can “revert)—my therapist advised boundaries with the in-laws, and my wife and I agreed to find a child psychologist to help our son; but it’s kind of a two step forward three steps back and then a half step to the left kind of experience as far as my transition...

 

That said, my wife is becoming more supportive; but there is just so; so much resistance...any help with how to approach so my son can adjust well would be much appreciated!

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Posts: 2
(@timothy82xsgk)
New Member     United States of America, Texas, Houston
Joined: 4 years ago

[postquote quote=88434]
Be very calm when approaching your son. Find a person who can explain to him on his level, so he can understand better on what is going on. I was in his position before for 13 years, I had a gay uncle but he was my mentor, and still is, even though I haven't seen or heard from him for ages, but that doesn't mean I don't love him. He explained to me how things were to my level. I am not gay, but I crossdress. Like ms. Jenny I am here to email you. My name is Timothy Glenn Skrabanek, I want to make as many friends as possible. If you need further help, post more questions on this site, and I promise to respond back. Peace be with you always and forever! Oh, for inspiration on you tube look up b.e.r. You're the One music video. I promise it will help. Later, hopeful one.

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Posts: 2
(@annalisa)
New Member     United States of America, Ohio, Middleport
Joined: 4 years ago

Don’t let them say it’s a mental problem because it isn’t. I found out it wasn’t when I seen my psychologist the first time . since I’m divorced my ex wife kept throwing it in my face that she will try to keep my sons away from me, and I found out that there are attorneys to help us also. Good luck with the family and you are not sick.

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Posts: 1831
Ambassador
(@flatlander48)
Noble Member     United States of America, California, Cathedral City
Joined: 5 years ago

Josie:

If you use the search string “9 ex-gay leaders” it will return links related to a group of people who founded and/or led ex-gay organizations. They have come to the conclusion that conversion therapy was inappropriate, ineffective and that they did more harm than good. One article was from TIME:  https://time.com/3065495/9-ex-leaders-of-the-gay-conversion-therapy-movement-apologize/  It contains a link to the original open letter.

Gender identity and sexuality are part and parcel of who we are as humans. It is inherent and not something that can be changed. People who say “It’s a choice” don’t understand what the choice actually is: Live a Lie or Live as the Person You Really Are. Living a Lie takes a terrible toll on ones psyche. Anyway, it is something to be shown to people who think you can be “fixed”...

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Posts: 20
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(@jamie1977)
Eminent Member     United States of America, Maryland, Baltimore
Joined: 4 years ago

As others have said, there is nothing wrong and no problem to solve.

With regards to your son, I wish you all the luck in the world.  I also have a 5 you little boy who is very attached to his daddy.  He does not know, yet, and I am afraid that he will not take it well (at first).  But remember, kids are (at heart) very accepting... discrimination and hate are learned traits not innate traits.  Find a good child therapist (who has experience in this area) to help and give him some time/space.. I suspect that he will come around.

Cheers,

Mikayla

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