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What are you most afraid of?

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(@charee)
Reputable Member     Canada, Hawarden, SK, Canada
Joined: 5 years ago
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My amazing wife and I watched a movie on Netflix this past week about a basketball team who came from humble beginnings. Coach Carter; a wonderful film of triumph of the human spirit. Several times throughout the film the coach would ask one of the players, what are you most afraid of?Each time a student was asked they would reply with various things that they were afraid of on this journey of life.

Recently I wrote an article about playing small. I referenced the line, our playing small does not serve the world and today I would like to share with you where that phrase came from and share it in more detail.

The quote had been stamped as being a part of one of Nelson Mandela’s speeches after he became the first black president of south Africa ending the tyranny of the apartheid. The truth is the quote comes from a best-selling self-help book written by Marianne Williamson in 1989, “A Return to Love.” Williamson uses the quote in her book and it somehow, thanks to the internet, became attributed to Nelson Mandela.

Here is the quote Williamson wrote in its entirety:

 Our deepest fear is not that we are weak. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world ... As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

We spend our lifetime doing our utmost best to not be too big, not say too much, make waves or be too loud; in some cases, even being seen is too much for some, so we shrink into the shadows and hide our gifts by making ourselves small.

I have been writing articles and doing Life Coaching for a few decades now and one common thread or belief I repeatedly hear from clients is the “I feel like I am not good enough” theme. I do not think I am above anyone or better than; I do believe with every fiber of my being however, that we are all equal beings and each of us has something to give the world that will make it a more enjoyable ride fore all of us on the planet.

I began this adventure by writing about working through my own fears of being seen. Writing about my own journey of living in small town Saskatchewan among hard working manly men and strong women who I believed would judge me and even attack me for being different.

My own fears

I had made up a story that I might be rejected, attacked, ridiculed, or shamed for simply being my authentic self. As I worked through my own fears, I began to realize that 99% of those fears were inside not outside of me.

This week ponder the story you often tell yourself that keeps you small. I believe that the common, purpose of every human on the planet is to give the gift of who we are to the world.

As the late Dr Wayne Dyer said, don’t die with your music still in you!

What is the song you came to sing? What is the gift you came here to give? By shrinking from being seen, I have learned, that I have not been serving the world well and supporting the liberation of others as well as myself.

By giving the gift of who I am to the world, I have witnessed so many people liberating themselves and becoming free.

Simply by being you and being seen, you are improving your own life and also the lives of others for generations to come, so, thank you for reading Your Weekly Reset  and thank you for being exactly who you are! Be you; be seen.

Namasté

 Char

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Posts: 20
(@rachel1300)
Eminent Member     United Kingdom, Buckinghamshire, milton keyenes
Joined: 4 years ago

Well I'd have thought a provoking message like this would be stacked with comments. Well I for one enjoyed reading this and hope it makes my life a little better . Yhank you.

Rachel. x

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(@charee)
Joined: 5 years ago

Reputable Member     Canada, Hawarden, SK, Canada
Posts: 219

...But with the help of you and others here and my therapist, I will get through it. I must. I don’t want to live my life as an emotional wreck, who isolates herself from others out of fear.[ I won’t.]

-Hey Rachel, I don't know if you saw the comment I wrote you above, I just noticed that I posted it in the wrong place lol

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Posts: 219
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Topic starter
(@charee)
Reputable Member     Canada, Hawarden, SK, Canada
Joined: 5 years ago

Awe Thaaankyou Rachel, the more I allow myself to be free and seen, the more I become aware of the many horror stories I had made up in my head of the terrifying possible outcomes that to date, have never happened. In fact, since exposing my authenticity, only a couple of times people voiced a negative opinion.

Instead, I am discovering that although there may be a few minds that are not big enough to accept us, I have found that the majority of people just smile and say, good for you!! Most don't even give me a second glance these days haha

I walk through the isles of the grocery store smiling because everyone smiles and says nice things to me; it's pretty amazing Rachel.

Thanks so much for your comments dear, I am grateful.
See you on our next Live Sessions?

Namaste Rachel n big huggles Hon
Char

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Posts: 31
(@jaiymelynne)
Eminent Member     United States of America, Nevada, Las Vegas
Joined: 5 years ago

Char,
You know I love all your words. So inspiring. And I think you are right on here. I feel like I've lived my life, up to now, afraid "to be found out". I always looked like I knew what I was doing as a chef, but I was winging it the whole time. Faking it, perhaps. As I write that, perhaps that's what I was doing in my life as a man and husband too. Faking it. Not really into it. Just doing what I was "supposed" to do; never really happy as a chef or a man. Always wondering "what do I want to be when I grow up?" JaiymeLynne does wonder that too. Can she really be "one of the girls". What will she be, when she fully comes out? What is her purpose, other than to LIVE in each moment. Be Present in each moment. I do see options ahead, but I think as Ms Williamson states, "It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us." I believe I know where my light is, but am fearful of letting it shine.
But with the help of you and others here and my therapist, I will get through it. I must. I don't want to live my life as an emotional wreck, who isolates herself from others out of fear. I won't.
Thank you again for all you do and the words you write,
JaiymeLynne

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(@charee)
Joined: 5 years ago

Reputable Member     Canada, Hawarden, SK, Canada
Posts: 219

…But with the help of you and others here and my therapist, I will get through it. I must. I don’t want to live my life as an emotional wreck, who isolates herself from others out of fear.[ I won’t.]

"I won't" are such Empowering words JaiymeLynn. You are well on the path of living Free dear.
That was a huge step for me as well to go from "I can't, to I won't"
You're growing Hon an I am sooo proud of you!
Believe it or not, you are lighting a candle for everyone who is one step behind you on their journey.
I Am Grateful for you Dear, Keep On!!

Namaste' JaiymeLynn
and warm huggle, always dear
Char

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Posts: 8
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(@transwomansandi)
Active Member     United States of America, Alabama, Hayden
Joined: 4 years ago

what i was most afraid of it did happen i was outed at work now that it all out the is nothing to be afraid of

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(@charee)
Joined: 5 years ago

Reputable Member     Canada, Hawarden, SK, Canada
Posts: 219

aaaaand that is a beautiful thing!!

The only thing to be afraid of, is succumbing to being afraid lol

You are so much more powerful than you yet know, and you are a Leader Sandy, which is my real middle name by the way haha how fun!

Namaste' sweet soul, onward and Outward hahaha and of course, big huggles dear
Char

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Member
(@transwomansandi)
Joined: 4 years ago

Active Member     United States of America, Alabama, Hayden
Posts: 8

i don't know if i'm a leader all i do know is i look at the world and have to say it gone mad

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(@charee)
Joined: 5 years ago

Reputable Member     Canada, Hawarden, SK, Canada
Posts: 219

yes it has, all the more need for leaders hehe
I simply love going out publicly now as authentically me, and in being seen, and confident, we are leading hehe that's how I see it anyhow haha

I recall a young man who was curious but afraid to ask, then as I dressed more openly, he did ask, and now he is sooo much more free than I was at his age, and that is a wonderful thing hehe
Thanks for being you Sandy, I am grateful for you my friend 🙂

Namaste'
n huggles Dear

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Posts: 20
(@rachel1300)
Eminent Member     United Kingdom, Buckinghamshire, milton keyenes
Joined: 4 years ago

Sounds like me, still learning the site. how are you today hun X?

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(@charee)
Joined: 5 years ago

Reputable Member     Canada, Hawarden, SK, Canada
Posts: 219

Today is a wonderful day Rachel, today I get to be meeee hahaha

Namaste'
n huggles dear
Char

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Member
(@rachel1300)
Joined: 4 years ago

Eminent Member     United Kingdom, Buckinghamshire, milton keyenes
Posts: 20

That's great news I really look forward to being me all day, but I'm at work so much it rarely happens.
I have just had my Christmas wig delivered 🙂 new dress waiting at the post office too, brought new shoes a month ago, I just need new nails and I'm ready for a few days of being me. 🙂 not to mention the Basque I've wanted for so long and treated myself to last week. I do love stockings so much but never seem to wear them??
Have you any plans for the holidays?

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(@charee)
Joined: 5 years ago

Reputable Member     Canada, Hawarden, SK, Canada
Posts: 219

Hey Rachel, yeah, my plans for the "holidays" haha are to bury myself in getting my web sites functional so a lot of time sitting at the pc learning tecky bits hahaha and of course, hanging out with my Amazing wife Bless, today we set up the tree and decorate is the plan hehe

Take some deep breaths and soak up every second of freedom you can Rachel; then say to yourself, THIS is how I choose to be and feel allll the time, thank you 😉 Things will start to show up that will help that become your reality as it has for me. It takes time, but it does show up when we do this Hon.

I wish you a silky, fun Holiday season dear, until we chat n next then...
Namaste'
n huggles Rachel
Char

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(@charee)
Joined: 5 years ago

Reputable Member     Canada, Hawarden, SK, Canada
Posts: 219

I have a very steep learning curve on these tecky devices Rachel haha it seems to take me hours to accomplish what most folks I know can do in minutes hahaha,
I work a day gig doing renovations so often there's not much energy left after the days work even to get online lol But I am practicing Hon hahaha

Namaste'
n huggles Rachel
Char

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