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[Sticky] Living, as a woman - just as a woman

6 Posts
7 Users
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Posts: 197
Topic starter
Reputable Member     Canada, British Columbia, Victoria
Joined: 2 years ago

It has been interesting to watch what is happening with the world's viewpoint and attitude towards members of the LGBQTI2S community. Where I reside has been called one of the safest places in my country for trans people. But with all the stuff going on in the States, the UK and other parts of Europe, where our right to even exist is questioned, there's been a noticeable change in how we are seen. It was quite easy to blend in, and still is relatively easy if you pass reasonably well.  With all the anti trans cr*p in the media making it into the news, what's happening now is average citizens, who never even paid attention to us, now look around to see if they can "spot a tranny."

In my personal case, I have often worn a small pin that simply says "Intersex Pride". With the arrival of Pride Month, I noticed a distinct difference in how people reacted to me when on the bus to and from work and while in various stores or out to eat.

So, no more pin, no more announcing that I am trans and intersex. The ladies at work, church, and those i ride the bus with, all view me as a lady, a woman, so I know I pass as one.

To all my girlfriends here on TGH, I just want to live my life as the woman that I am, an intersex female.  No announcing myself as being unique or special anymore, just living, as a woman.


Ms. Lauren M

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Joined: 1 month ago

Estimable Member     Australia, Queensland, Brisbane
Posts: 57

@reallylauren I too live in  country where >95% of the population are accepting and to the large extent allow us to pass bye without a glance. I do have concerns however when I see antiitrans influencers (and they are on the inrease) bombarding the general public with hate speech. IMO education is the key, so if I feel in a semi safe space I will encourage and be open to others allowing them to ask questions and get to know a transperson.

Joined: 3 years ago

Estimable Member     United Kingdom, Wiltshire, Marlborough
Posts: 137

@reallylauren There is a time to step out of the front line, I totally understand and agree. There is little to be gained by encouraging criticism on a day to day basis, and frankly it is too painful to take that attention.
i do feel it is a backlash against an over zealous Trans drive...don't get me wrong, I agree with the motives and objectives, just the pace was a little too fast. I believe it will all calm down again though.
The whole point of transition is to live and work as a woman, there is a point when the label 'trans' stops that from being fully realised. I will support political progress and march in Pride Rallies but on the bus or in a supermarket, I don't wear a badge...of any kind. I'm me, no label required.


Posts: 128
Bronze - Annual
Estimable Member     Panama, Panama, Panama
Joined: 3 years ago

I am glad for you, Lauren. You deserve the right to live as the woman you are. 


Posts: 18
Eminent Member     United States of America, Florida, Bradenton
Joined: 7 months ago

I'm so happy for you! That is my end goal to pass as a woman but knowing I am not 100% the same as a biological woman.

Posts: 106
Estimable Member     United States of America, Wisconsin, Madison
Joined: 2 years ago

Thanks for posting this Lauren. I do much of the same as you and Alex do and I think many women do the same also.  As you know, I'm intersex too but only advertise it at certain times like wearing a pin or monogramed clothing at Pride events.  I'm dressed every day and just go about my business like everyone else usually blending in.  I think that it's similar to when I adjust my cleavage or wear an evening gown or jeans.  I can choose to make a very outward sign regarding what I might want to share with the world or not.  I try to be very careful as to what I wear publicly but I also want to have fun and be myself.  Lately though, I am very watchful since I also detect an increase in craziness in the world and it is easy to have a problem.  Stay safe everyone.  Marg


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