Wow. If the information and support available now had been available to me in my 2o’s I would have done that. Being a fan of science fiction, and working in medicine, I sometimes wonder if one day there could be some sort of gene therapy for gender dysphoria (what a movie that would make). As it was, for most of my life I existed in a vaccume with the company of one. It took an ugly divorce and an introduction to the kink-BDSM community for me to begin asking hard questions, and ultimately to accept who I am, or rather, who I always was. I’m planning this to happen at 62 or 63, and the upside is that I have an accepting loving partner that is willing and eager to share this journey with me. Discovering the woman I am at a later juncture in life has its benefits. I know who I am. And like the person I’ve become… and would like to live as a woman to make that person finally whole. With an additional story to tell for sure. Thanks for sharing and good luck !
I think I can understand how you feel. Unlike you, I was born a boy. But I want to be a girl. Since I was very small, I liked girls' things, such as their toys and little dresses. When I was in junior high school, I began to try wearing women's clothes. Every time I put on a dress and look at myself in the mirror, I feel like I should be a girl. I have been entangled and confused for so many years, I don't know who I am in the end, I can't understand myself. Then I couldn't stand it anymore and I made up my mind to be a girl. But this decision was again opposed by parents. After a long struggle with them, they finally agreed. In fact, the moment I made up my mind, I felt free. In the struggle that followed, I felt I was happy. I'm getting closer and closer to the life I want. So if you want to be a transsexual, go for it. The good life is for the brave. It is better to fight bravely than to doubt yourself every day.
Since a very young age, I have known that there was something very different about me. As time went on, I developed feelings that I was much more female than male. Unfortunately, due to the time and environment that I grew up in, my feelings were repressed. This had profound effects on me as I have been relatively withdrawn, had a hard time maintaining friendships and in general, didn't achieve my full potential. I have been a crossdresser as long as I can remember and I can now see that this was my response to the dysphoria that I felt by forcing myself into male roles.
Now as times have changed and I have felt freer to express my authentic self. I got help from a psychiatrist, and explored my feelings and ultimately came to some degree of peace with who I really am. Now I have come to the realization that I am more than a crossdresser, I am actually a woman! While I have lost a lot of time, I am now trying hard to make up for this loss by moving myself in the right direction.