Hi so I came out as transgender about 3 months ago when I socially transitioned. Before then I thought I was non binary but realised that I just wasn't ready to admit the truth.
Since coming out I feel amazing, happier and more confident, but theres a problem. When I'm around people who knew the old me, I feel uncomfortable and a bit awkward. There was a group from my church who went to a bbq and it felt like all eyes were on me. I kept feeling like I was a fraud or that people didn't believe me. Now I feel depressed because I dont know if I ignored people, especially my church leader who helped me come out about this in the first place. I'm even considering going somewhere new entirely where nobody knows me and people will accept me for who I am without fearing that they will find out about the old me. Are these normal feelings to have?
Mickey:
Glad that you joined us! I hope that being here will always be a good experience for you.
Regarding your question, I think the vast majority of us go through initial periods where we are very self conscious and are overly concerned with what others think. After we come out and find ourselves in public, we have to remember that this is completely uncharted territory. It takes some getting used to and is not the work of a minute. What you are feeling will eventually wear off, but probably at its own pace.
In the meantime, I suggest that you complete your Profile page. It helps others understand what your situation is and what your goals are. Your Profile page will always be readily accessible and can be updated at any time.
If you would like to search for other members near you, click on Social in the menu and then Member Directory.
Yeah, feeling like a fraud and being self conscious at the start seems to be a common experience. I went through that for quite a while, I just had to keep in mind why I'm doing this and how I will feel as the process continues. One thing that helped is remembering the "button question" that if there was a real button that could change your birth sex to the opposite of what it is without any surgery or cost to you would you press it and I personally would as then my sex would match my gender. Apparently cis people would not press the button even if it gave them 1 million dollars as well. But, that is not the definite proof you're trans so, don't feel bad if my example doesn't work for you. Otherwise talking it out here or with someone who understands and will listen is also a great way to help deal with those kind of feelings and thoughts.
