Crossdresser or Transgender

Welcome , you know cross dressing is very different than being Transgender , a short lived fantasy of a few days is not the same thing - being true transgender  is a deep hard core of " SELF " not a weekend warrior fetish and back to a suite and tie Monday morning to go to work - my sense was very young at 5 years old , unless you've felt this deeply all along through out the years like literally wanting girl equipment etc. everyday and waking up every morning knowing it's the wrong body and social way of being - I guess the point is satisfying a strong fetish to self stimulate your self to satisfaction  is not the same as feeling and being like in my case female all the time 24/7 .

Welcome Travis,

As Krystal says, and I can assure you from my own experience, being a crossdresser and being transgender are entirely separate. You don't just decide to "do it", you either are or you aren't. I've always known, from the age of four years old, that I was supposed to be a girl and grew up with that knowledge always in my thoughts.

I used to crossdress, not for any sexual gratification, but because those were the clothes I was supposed to wear. I have now transitioned and live as, and am legally, a woman. There are lots of our stories here on the TGH forum that you can read and get a much better feeling of what being a trans woman is all about.

I wish you well as you explore this part of your humanity.

Hugs,

Ms. Lauren M

Well I think maybe some are like kittens in a yarn ball and don't unravel the truth of their life and transgender till later in life. Maybe some just don't have all the facts.

I know that so have faced trauma during their youth and the young lady was put away. And they have struggled for many years to overcome that.

I had a couple times as a young person that it happened to me. And hell that came down on myself and the young lady within ..I still don't struggle to speak about...

But from as far back as I can remember, I can see and feel her...she has always been a part of everything...more so..she was everything.... waiting for a way to break free from the shell she was in.

This is just my thoughts and opinions.

Shiloh Rose 🌹

Travis:

As has been stated, MANY trans people know from very early ages that there is something different about them that is related to gender. Similar to gay people, they knew that what they felt was counter to the expectations of family, friends, teachers, etc.

Transitioning, or not, is a very difficult thing to sort out by yourself. I suspect that because transitioning effects so many facets of ones life and can bring about MAJOR changes in ones life, conscious thought about it is hard to do. Our minds want to avoid stressful activities and so we don’t think about what we need to think about.

This is why many members have found positive benefits from working with a therapist. However, it shouldn’t be just any therapist. It needs to be someone with experience in gender issues. Not every therapist has this background.

Now, it does turn out that some crossdressers do turn out to actually be transgender. Anecdotally, it doesn’t seem to be a large percentage. It is difficult for researchers to get funding for studying transgender issues, so many questions remain unanswered or partially so.

Anyway, there is no rush to sort this all out. Haste is not your friend here. If, in fact, major changes to your life are warranted, you need to be really comfortable with what will happen. The middle of transition is not the time to be figuring stuff out. For the most part, that should have happened before.

Hi Travis!

The answer you seek is deep within. Rub the lamp! I hope you embrace whatever you find.

Barb 🧞

Travis, I agree with many of the other ladies in this thread. You don't just wake up one day and say "Oh, I think I'll become a woman."  Like some here, I was an off-and-on crossdresser in my early years. I knew I was super attracted to things feminine, and I knew (this was in the 1960s and '70s) that there was a theoretical pathway to womanhood. But it was just not a socially accepted life path at that time. (Not that crossdressing was exactly  celebrated, but getting caught with a pair of your mom's or sister's panties invited nowhere near the trauma that would result from telling your parents they had a daughter, not a son.) So I spent many years denying the woman in me, telling myself I could be "normal," or failing that, just be an occasional crossdresser.  But as the years went by, the crossdressing didn't help - in fact, it made the longing worse. But by the time I could face what I truly was, I was married and had kids - vows and commitments I absolutely would not upset or dishonor.  But now, years later, with the kids grown and gone, and with my wife in late stages of dementia, the woman in me will no longer be denied.  I am on my way at last!  My point in telling you all this, Travis, is that transitioning from a male to a female role is not easy, not cheap, and definitely not something to do just because you think you might like it. It's something you do because something in you is screaming that you NEED this.  So if you are in a genuine "am I or aren't I" mode, find a gender therapist and work through this with him/her. You may find that you are fine just as you are. Or maybe there really is a woman within you.

Hello Travis,

Welcome to our TransgGender Heaven (TGH) site: A Wonderful, Accepting, Loving, Helpful Community where you can be safe and be yourself.
The Warmth, Compassion and Hospitality of our community members can be found throughout the site.
You can read about the knowledge and experiances of others on a similar path by reading articles and in the forums and chatting in chat rooms.
My hope is that you will become comfortable here and make many new friends.

Glad you are here,
Terri Anne, Ambassador

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