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Hello all I am Samantha from New Hampshire, USA

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Posts: 15
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(@samantha85)
Active Member     United States of America, New Hampshire, West Lebanon
Joined: 2 years ago

Hello Everyone,

I am Samantha from New Hampshire, USA.

I came out as Bisexual in 2015 even though I am Pansexual. Reason for coming out as Bi and then really I am Pan is because there are stupid people in my life that would make fun of Pansexual with jokes that aren't funny about it, while Bisexuality they understand and wont joke about. So my most trusted friends know me as Pansexual, but for the challenged people in my life who dont understand Pansexuality they know me as labeled as Bisexual.

I tried to come out at age 10 when sharing that I had a boyfriend and it was ill received by strictly religious parents who told me that being a homosexual that I was going to burn in hell. I then had to lie and say that I didn't have homosexual attraction to another boy and lied that it was his idea and I was just going along with it. When I came out in 2015 however it brought to light the years of lying of who I am and my preference to not be heterosexual.

In 2018 I joined a local transgender support group and I loved attending the meetings and being there to support others as well as them support me with my needs of answers to questions. My job getting crazy cut into my ability to attend and then Covid hit and shut down all social gatherings and so I have been away from others like me and so tonight I went out in search for groups to join up with and not feel so isolated from others like myself.

Myself I like to help others more than receive help myself. I enjoy making friends and chatting about just about anything. I like to learn new things from others, especially techniques for makeup application and doing nails.

I am divorced and have a 17 year old daughter who accepts me 100% which is a big help. Her mom told me that she didn't marry me to become a lesbian as well as there were many other incompatibilities with us. I finally left the home in June 2020 into an apartment where I live with my amazing Fiance who is a Bisexual female and she completely accepts me as who I truly am and is supportive of me in every way. Her and I are same in size and so she moved in with me and just started wearing my selection of womens clothing. Only thing I had to buy was larger bras for her as my bras aren't of cup size large enough for her. She left a failed relationship as well from a boyfriend who didnt accept her for who she was and what she wanted in life. It was the perfect pairing when we both found each other and I so wish that we found each other sooner in life to not suffer as long as we had prior to being together.

My fiance is pregnant with twins and we are so very happy. I asked her if I will have to change myself to look like a father as 100% male for our childrens lives growing up and she told me to just be myself and all will be fine; I dont need to hide who I am from my children. They will accept me better having seen their non-binary parent a fatherly/motherly figure alongside their mother.

Other than writing a book here about myself as I can type lots, I am going to end it here. I look forward to being a part of this group and helping if I can.

Samantha πŸ™‚

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Posts: 179
Silver
(@briellerose)
Estimable Member     United States of America, Pennsylvania, Pittsburgh
Joined: 3 years ago

Hi Samantha, you had a tough journey getting to this point, but it sounds like you are finally in a place of acceptance and love. Your fiancee sounds like an incredible person and I believe you will be happy for many years to come. I'm about 4 months in with HRT and will socially transition in about 8 months.

As far as a male role model, I tried that and had some successes, but never shared my authentic self with my wife, daughter, doctors, and a few friends until the middle of last year. Just because you present a male persona doesn't mean you would be the best parent your kids need - they need to know the real you and they will admire your courage and heart!

Thanks for sharing your story - it gave me a lift today!

Hugs,

Brie

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Posts: 1831
Ambassador
(@flatlander48)
Noble Member     United States of America, California, Cathedral City
Joined: 5 years ago

Samantha:

Glad that you found us! I hope that being here will have a positive effect on your journey.

For many here, the intersection of being transgender and married is a minefield. Some relationships can weather the storm, but many cannot. I have been fortunate in that my wife and I are still together, but for many it can turn into a very contentious situation. It just isn’t the arrangement that we thought we would carry into the future. But, in your case, it sounds like things are going well for you and your partner. Very Good!!

Many of the support groups and gathering turned to teleconferencing via ZOOM or other communications software. Now that things are loosening, some have begun to shift to a hybrid arrangement where some attendees are in person and others are online. From our experience, this format my continue as many folks are reluctant to spend time in close proximity to others, wish to avoid travel time or are seeking other opportunities. However, as you don’t live close to a metropolitan area, I can see challenges.

I encourage you to complete your Profile page. It really helps others to understand your situation and goals. It will always be available and can be updated at any time if things change for you.

If you would like to search for other members who may be close, click on Social in the menu and then Member Directory.

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Posts: 15
Member
Topic starter
(@samantha85)
Active Member     United States of America, New Hampshire, West Lebanon
Joined: 2 years ago

Thank You so much and definitely going to update my profile.

Also I was going to join to become a silver member but it looks like PayPal isn't an option. I don't have a credit card to use and so not sure if the owner of the website here might be able to add PayPal as a payment option so that others like myself may be able to join vs be stuck in the limited free account.

I suppose I could get one of those pre-paid credit cards but some sites I have learned in the past after buying one and adding money to it don't accept them as a valid credit card because they are pre-paid and not a standard credit card.

If your able to contact the owner of this website to see what options I might have to becoming a silver member that would be greatly appreciated. πŸ™‚

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Posts: 15
Member
Topic starter
(@samantha85)
Active Member     United States of America, New Hampshire, West Lebanon
Joined: 2 years ago

Thank You So Much and I am so going to just be myself to my children so they know the real me πŸ™‚

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Posts: 590
(@terria67)
Honorable Member     United States of America, California
Joined: 6 years ago

Hello Samantha,

Welcome to our TransgGender Heaven (TGH) site: A Wonderful, Accepting, Loving, Helpful Community where you can be safe and be yourself.
The Warmth, Compassion and Hospitality of our community members can be found throughout the site.
You can read about the knowledge and experiances of others on a similar path by reading articles and in the forums and chatting in chat rooms.
My hope is that you will become comfortable here and make many new friends.

Glad you are here,
Terri Anne, Ambassador

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