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hey everyone

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(@riven61)
New Member     United States of America, Virginia, Richmond
Joined: 6 months ago

Glad to finally felt comfortable coming here and seeking advice. I am interested in transitioning - my only fear is that I'm 34 years old and i have a very square jaw line.

I first felt like i should have been a female when i was 23 when my friend encouraged me to wear her clothes - then she encouraged me to shave my legs. There were signs before that though, I'd tried on my mom's clothes as a kid. I finally felt like I found a friend that understood me. Then some awful things happened - and I ended up having to end my friendship with her. I haven't heard from her in years - I've tried reaching out, but silence.

So lately, i've been thinking about it more and more, and i feel like a stranger in my hairy manly body. I feel like i should have a smooth feminine body and I am new to even talking about this to someone let alone a forum full of people.

I hope some of you understand where I stand (or I'm coming from) - and can provide some help or support, or advice on what I should do next to see if I should transition.

 

Thanks,

Marcie

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3 Replies
(@Anonymous 31383)
Joined: 6 months ago

Active Member
Posts: 12

@riven61 Welcome Marcie to TGH!  You will find this to be a friendly, supportive community.  Alexis gave you good advice on a starting point.  I hope you can navigate your way to discovering and being the person you were meant to be.

Melissa 👠

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Member
(@kathy)
Joined: 1 year ago

Eminent Member     United States of America, Missouri, St. Louis
Posts: 21

Marcie,

Us older women become very nice looking, even with (older) and worrisome features. Some CIS women have masculine facial features, but that one feature is not the sole defining thing. It's like a puzzle that can't possibly fit together until it's done. The whole package matters.

Kathy

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Silver
(@ellilynn)
Joined: 1 year ago

Trusted Member     United States of America, Indiana, Bloomington
Posts: 78

@riven61 Hi, Marcie, and welcome.  I know very well the feeling of being in a body that didn't fit my mind.  I think Alexis made the best suggestion so far, find yourself a good therapist that can help you learn about yourself.  They don't have any answers, but they do generally ask the right questions.  The answers live within you.  It took me several years of therapy, and more of self study before I came to understand who and what I am.  Regarding your feeling that you should have a "smooth, feminine body", I understand that desire, and it's something I will never attain. My shoulder width is 2 inches wider than the average male and 4 inches wider than the average female, and I have a deep baritone voice that no amount of vocal coaching will ever get me to an alto range.  However, I came to the conclusion a long time ago that the external appearances aren't as important as the internal beliefs.  I know to my core that I am a woman, and no external opinion will ever change that.  A very wise person told me decades ago to never let anyone else's opinion of me become my reality.  It didn't happen overnight, but it did happen eventually.  Support from groups like you'll find here helped, but ultimately I had to accept myself as I am.  On some other social forums, my profile picture isn't a picture, but a question. "If I asked you to name all the things you love, how long would it take for you to name yourself?"  It took me decades before I could put myself on that list at #1.  Hopefully, your journey will be quicker, easier and less painful than mine.  If there is ever anything I can do to help, feel free to ask.  I'll do my best.

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Posts: 172
Managing Ambassador
(@alexispw)
Reputable Member     Canada, Alberta, Edmonton
Joined: 3 years ago

Hi Marcie , welcome . 

One of the best places to start is speaking with a therapist about how you feel . They will be able to help you short through your feelings so you have a better understand about who you are . Local transgender groups are always a great place to seek help . You can search our local places to find places near you Transgender Friendly Places Near Me – Transgender Heaven . Reach out to us here in the groups , forums and chat . Many members will be able to share their experiences with you . You are not alone on your journey . 

 

Alexis Thanks  

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Posts: 591
(@terria67)
Honorable Member     United States of America, California
Joined: 6 years ago

Hello Marcie,

Welcome to our TransGender Heaven (TGH) site: A Transgender Support Site. We are a wonderful, accepting, loving, helpful community where you can be safe and be yourself.

*We are an English Language Site. Therefore, it would be prefered that you converse in Engish for all general topics on the site.*

You can read about the knowledge and experiances of others on a similar path by reading articles and in the forums and chatting in chat rooms.

My hope is that you will become comfortable here and make many new friends.
Glad you are here. Looking forward to seeing you on the site.

Terri Anne, Ambassador

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