Hi from Kelly.
I'm new here.
@kellytgrl I'm relatively new here too. WELCOME!! Well, I guess I joined a couple of years ago...but haven't been much involved until now.
Kelly:
You found us! Very Good!
Always good to see another Midwesterner here. I’m originally from Toledo and lived in Joliet for a couple of years in the early 90’s. I was transferred to a plant we had in Ottawa and Joliet was the closest city of any size.
I believe that one of our strengths here is that our membership comes from all over, domestically and internationally. That results in a really broad range of situations and experiences. Regardless of the issue, there are many roads to town as you will see in the messages. While there is a lot of variation in our situations, and very rarely are any two situations the same, it does provide a deep database upon which to draw.
Regarding being comfortable in public, it is also one of those situations where there are many paths. Some choose Cold Turkey. Some choose a very gradual and phased approach. Still others are somewhere in between. I think a lot of it is related to how one’s personality works. At one extreme are the risk takers and at the other are those who prefer baby steps. There is no Right or Wrong.
That said, what I’ve noticed is that often trans women are very self-conscious. Visible nervousness on our part attracts attention, often of the wrong kind. In many cases, the general public is often absorbed in what that are doing so that they are not paying much attention to others in any great detail. However, when we fidget, fuss with our hair, tug on our clothes, etc. then people start to notice. Therefore, the best thing that we can do is just be relaxed and do what we are going to do.
Thanks for putting effort into your Profile. It really helps others to understand what’s going on for you and where you are headed.
@flatlander48 Hi. Thanks for taking the time to write.
While I was going out to a bar some years ago (20), I stopped for various reasons. The most I was doing after that was taking the occasional walk around the neighborhood at night.
Still, after years of trying, I met someone that I feel comfortable with and trying it again.
He's the one who got me out to a movie theater and there's talk of expanding my boundaries.
I am aware of how people are engaged in their own zone and often only see what they expect to. They see a dress and in the back of their mind they think girl while the rest of the brain is wondering what size popcorn to get.
I have also read about drawing unwanted attention to one's self by our actions and behavior. It does take some practice to try and blend in with the crowd, but eventually I'll be noticed and it just depends on how I react. I read one article that said not to worry about changing your voice, because you're not really fooling anyone anyway.
Thanks again,
KMK
@kellytgrl Hi Kelly,
Welcome. I see you are from Wheaton. I am from a bit east of there. I suspect Wheaton may be a difficult place to present openly as a trans woman.
Often times "growing where we are planted" is challenging, but no doubt many girls here face that and will be able to help you .
Kindly,
Charlene
Welcome to our community Kelly. When you get a chance check out: https://transgenderheaven.com/community/community-chat/tgh-site-resource-listing/#post-2332. Lots of really good and helpful stuff to aid in navigating around here. Hugs
@michellelarsen1 Thanks! What's the little button on the right side of the screen on my homepage?
Kelly, I'm going to assume you are referring to the one in the upper right corner. That is your notifications. When you see a blue 'dot' with a number in it, beside the bell, then someone has messaged you something. Hugs
@michellelarsen1 Oh no. I get the bell icon. The one that I was referring to is like a little slide button. It doesn't seem to do much except to slightly change the way the page looks. To the left is a photo icon, my picture in the middle of the page, and the slide button on the right. Thanks.
Kmk
Hmmm, I guess I should also ask what devise you are seeing this on. Any chance you can get a screenshot? You can post it here in the Forum. That may help. Hugs
@michellelarsen1 It is just a tab that shows either more or less of my profile on my screen. Thanks 🙂
Are we talking Wheaton, Ill.?
@kellytgrl I was born in Waukegan, though consider my hometown to be
Grayslake...and this was MANY, MANY years ago!!!...WHEW!!! ; )
Hi Kelly.
Welcome to TGH.
Gisela
Any connection with actor Will Wheaton of STNG?
