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New and scared

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Posts: 1
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Topic starter
(@jennyk1)
New Member     United States of America, Minnesota
Joined: 2 years ago

Hi everyone, I am new here.Β  New to trying to understand these things about myself. I am not out, I'm very scared about what is going on for me.

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10 Replies
Posts: 17
Member
(@gabbyeverett)
Active Member     United States of America, Texas, Columbus
Joined: 2 years ago

Jenny, there are only 3 barriers to "coming out". Your honest feelings of gender identity, your job situation, and how important are your family relationships. I was scared until I answered these three questions for myself at age 65. I knew I was a closet transvestite but counseling and self-examination told me that not should I come out, but I should also have surgical affirmation. I am now 68, physically and chemically female. Try to answer the questions concerning the three barriers and know it is ok to be scared. Gabby Everett

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Posts: 1831
Ambassador
(@flatlander48)
Noble Member     United States of America, California, Cathedral City
Joined: 5 years ago

Jenny:

You landed here! Than is a very important first step. You are in a safe place with your peers.

Many here have found that working with a therapist is very helpful. The human mind works to protect us and avoid difficult, stressful situations. When it comes to thinking about something that may have serious consequences for our lives going forward, it can be very hard to maintain focus. That’s where a therapist can help. But, it is important to work with someone who has experience with gender identity issues. Not everyone has that.

Are you connected with the Trans community in your area? That is also important as it helps to combat isolation and is often a source of validation. Being among our peers is a powerful reinforcement. Also, many LGBT centers have online support and social groups these days. That can be helpful in terms of times, scheduling and logistics.

I encourage you to complete your Profile page. It helps other members to understand your situation better. Remember that the page will always be available and can be updated at any time.

You can also search the member database to look for other members in your area of Minnesota. Click on Social in the menu and than Member Directory.

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Posts: 66
Member
(@natalieg)
Trusted Member     United States of America, Florida
Joined: 2 years ago

Jenny, it's normal to be nervous about this, especially when it isn't popular in mainstream circles, and Trans kids and their parents are being attacked by haters/zealots/fascists. But take heart, people are still transitioning.

The key is, build your courage and confidence by coming here often, and taking the sage advice of these folks. The last thing you want in public is a case of nerves.

I don't know your beliefs, but I attended a Unitarian universalist church today, met a lovely, positive, young transwoman there. The population is very trans affirming and accepting, and I didn't hear the words God or Jesus once, which is fine by me.

Take care, be happy! Peace

Natalie Gay

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Posts: 590
(@terria67)
Honorable Member     United States of America, California
Joined: 6 years ago

Hello Jenny,

Welcome to our wonderful, accepting, loving, helpful community where you can be safe and be yourself.

You can read about the knowledge and experiances of others on a similar path by reading articles and in the forums and chatting in chat rooms.
My hope is that you will become comfortable here and make many new friends.
Glad you are here. Looking forward to seeing you on the site.
Terri Anne, Ambassador

============ TGH MtF ChatRoom ============================
https://transgenderheaven.com/chat/mtf-transgender-chat/

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Posts: 1
Member
(@bridget2023)
New Member     Australia, Queensland, Brisbane
Joined: 2 years ago

I am new here to have been dressing up for years and now I feel like I am only comfortable when I am dressed and I am ready to go out but I am very scared i was hoping to find some friends here

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Posts: 213
Member
(@jillleanne)
Reputable Member     Canada, Ontario, Renfrew
Joined: 2 years ago

Jenny, hang in there. Lots of people just like you here trying to learn about themselves. Grab a coffee, sit down in a comfy chair and start exploring this site and when you have a question and can’t find the answer, post the question for all to see and respond to.the help you need starts here.

hugs, Jillleanne

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Posts: 17
Member
(@gabbyeverett)
Active Member     United States of America, Texas, Columbus
Joined: 2 years ago

Lee, that was my initial fear also. This was before I started HRT. After HRT I started feeling more comfortable. I soon realized that people who saw me weren't trying to out me so I didn't have to "pass". Gabby

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