Hello, my name is Regina I am new to TGH and looking to find new friends and encouragement on my journey along the way, I have known nothing but rejection from my very religious family. I have tried to come out twice before, I have learned a lot about myself and who I really am, sad to say it has taken me years with a lot of regret as I am 49 now
Welcome!
I hope that being here will be a good experience for you. There is a wealth of knowledge and experience here, so don’t be afraid to lean on it.
While we may regret when the light bulb finally went off regarding our sexuality or gender identity, I think the message is heard when we are able to hear it. But, first we have to get to a place where that can happen.
In a few weeks, hopefully I will be 72. Sorting out my sexuality began at 42 and considering my gender identity started at about 56. I came out (in front of ~130 people) as transgender, non-binary at 66.
It happens when it happens...
Hi Regina! I'm new here too. I didn't experience years of regret, as this just hit me in the past year. (I'm 60 now) If anything, I might regret not realizing it sooner, and/or not realizing the options available to me sooner. At the same time, I think it's like the old saying about the best time to plant a tree. The best time was 20 years ago. The second best time is today. 🙂
That is an interesting thought about the tree, never heard that before, but I see it about like " you can't change the past, but you can change the future" thank you for your words of encouragement
Yes it will happen when it happens, and for me I feel it has happened twice before and I let the door shut, so now it is happening again and don't want to let the door shut again in my face, all this just makes it so much worse, the dysphoria gets worse each time as well as it gets harder to come out each time, because you feel you are looked at like some stupid person that don't know what they want out of life, when in turn you really do, but others will not accept it
[postquote quote=90833]
For some reason, I often think of the world in terms of quotes, song lyrics and other text. After reading your message, what came to mind for me was a song that Rick Nelson did back in the day called Garden Party. The particular passage was:
Well, it’s alright now,
I learned my lesson well,
You see, you can’t please everybody,
So you got to please yourself...
We spend so much time and effort trying to live up to someone else’s expectations of us. Unfortunately the person that we want to be and need to be gets lost in the shuffle. I won’t say that it is easy, but it is honest.
A most recent phrase would be simply:
Don’t Be Them,
U B U...