Hey, my name is Stacey. I’m in a relationship and have been for over a year with a trans woman (mtf) we finally got the month for her surgery after her meeting last week. So September is the big month.
Im just looking for anyone I can talk to. I’d love to hear people’s experiences and get some more perspective on some things. I’d like to chat to any other partners there may be out there as I haven’t seemed to come across many that I could talk to.
Im sorry if this violates any rules or people feel that I shouldn’t be on here. Feel free to let me know x
Hi Stacey,
No, as far as we are respectful and we understand that we are talking openly to a wide range of sexual preferences (mainly oriented towards Transgender folk, but not limited to) any question is OK.
I have two questions for you:
1. Why are you with her in the first place? This means: what defines your relationship in the emotional aspects of it?
2. After the surgery, are those aspects going, or are in danger of disappearing?
I, for one, believe that Affirmative Surgery is for those who are out of synchrony with their bodies, not with their minds. If there is an affective disorder or an emotional issue, that is another topic. But the person that she already is, if she is good, if she loves you, if she respects you, if she is your partner in all things, will remain the same one after the procedure.
If anything, the relationship will flourish as long as you both are in total agreement, and are OK with all the aspects, both social and personal.
We are here for our sisters, and brothers, and their loved ones.
Hey Marianne,
I would always strive to do my best to be respectful and never intentionally hurt someone. I’m here to learn. Each person it different and I understand that 😊
To answer your questions, I’m with her because she makes me happy. She’s everything I want in a partner. We are open and honest with one another. We communicate and she has kept me in the loop since day 1.
For the second part, no I don’t think that they are in danger of going. I have my worries about healing. Things like is she going to want me now that she has finally become who she always wanted to be. What if I can’t give her what’s she wants.
I, for one, believe that Affirmative Surgery is for those who are out of synchrony with their bodies, not with their minds. If there is an affective disorder or an emotional issue, that is another topic. But the person that she already is, if she is good, if she loves you, if she respects you, if she is your partner in all things, will remain the same one after the procedure.
If anything, the relationship will flourish as long as you both are in total agreement, and are OK with all the aspects, both social and personal.
I do thank you for how you put and brought forward the issue of body over mind and it has made me stop and think. I do believe that you are right.
Min just trying to be strong and be everything she needs me to be in these upcoming months and thereafter.
Thank you you for your reply 😊
An absolute pleasure Stacy.
I thank you for the opportunity to help and please, if there is any other question, or you just need to chat, I try to be here every other day (not weekends though).
I wish you both the best and hope that you grow wiser, older and happier together. May all go well with the Affirmative Surgery.
💖🌸💗
I totally agree. Well said.👍
Hey, my name is Stacey. I’m in a relationship and have been for over a year with a trans woman (mtf) we finally got the month for her surgery after her meeting last week. So September is the big month.
Im just looking for anyone I can talk to. I’d love to hear people’s experiences and get some more perspective on some things. I’d like to chat to any other partners there may be out there as I haven’t seemed to come across many that I could talk to.
Im sorry if this violates any rules or people feel that I shouldn’t be on here. Feel free to let me know x
If you really love this person it shouldn't matter what the person looks like on the outside but what's on the inside that counts , think back to what attracted your attention to this person and relish that feeling, .
I've seen quite a few couples who have stayed together after surgery - so no reason why you can't.
Hi, I'm new on here but I am the partner of a wonderful transman! We've been together just over 3 years.
We've been through a lot together and still going strong. He's yet to have top surgery and suffers with dysphoria, but we are getting there.
Having the top operation this year and I'm positive that this will bring us even closer.
I'm sure the same can be said for you and your partner. Just remember that you fell in love with the heart and mind of that wonderful person, a body is just a vessel, nothing more.
Be happy and love each other x
Maxine
