A more detailed response to a Forum question

Orientation is different from Preference as well as Identity

Many people have issues understanding these differences due to the binary preconception of the human sexuality.

I find that using the Genderbread Person (for us and for others) helps to explain better what is the difference, and why there are so many combinations (as the colours of the rainbow – see what I did here? *wink*)

So you have four different areas to express one’s identity:

  1. Gender Identity
  2. Gender Expression
  3. Anatomical Sex
  4. Sexual Orientation

All of these in a Cis-gender, Heterosexual person point toward binary understanding, but it doesn’t explain why cis-genders are attracted to same-sex people (now you have a variant and Gay/Queer appears.) You then add how you express yourself (regardless of your anatomical sex, being that primary or secondary characteristics) etc…


Head to this website to get a much more in depth explanation that will help you more and also listen to (and maybe follow) Blaire White having an incredible and civilized conversation with Ben Shapiro (he’s an interesting fellow because of what he says and how he talks about those topics):

After Twitter went into an uproar after Ben’s appearance on the Rubin Report where they discussed pronouns and myself, I decided to reach out and have a civil conversation with him.


I hope all these resources help you, and of course I would be more than happy to keep the conversation opened

Truly yours,


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Marianne Ferrara

Hello all! I am Marianne, I am originally from Mexico, and now residing in the US. I am a "Transbian" i.e.: a Transgeder Woman married to a Cis Woman. I started my transition back in 2008 and HRT in 2010, so this year marks my 10th anniversary! Don’t time flies when you’re having “fun”? I have been in several groups and only now I have taken with me the responsibility to stop being in the backstage and become more active. My life has been a total rollercoaster with many moments that makes me wonder how it may have been if I only had someone to talk to and trust. Many of the wrong turns I took may have been averted. I hope that by me being here I can make a positive mark and pass forward all the goodness that I have received in the past, and help others to succeed in their own paths. This is the last “I” that will be used and let’s start talking about “you” and “us” and make this place a Heaven, because, as Korg said (Thor Ragnarok) “As long as the foundations are still strong, we can rebuild this place. It will become a haven for all peoples and aliens of the universe.” Love you all and welcome to TGH! Hope to catch up with you in the chat, forums and groups, and if you happen to see me around, don’t be shy, I was and lost a lot of good opportunities already I may be MIA when big things happen in my small world, such as Jewish Holidays or lots of work. I will be around, sometimes it may take a little more than "a couple of days" but I will always be back Love, Marianne

Latest posts by Marianne Ferrara (see all)

  1. Milena Digard 2 months ago

    Thank you, SO MUCH!!!, Marianne! Truly, “Words Of Encouragement”! Thank
    you, again.

  2. Author
    Marianne Ferrara 3 months ago

    Hi all, thank you for your kind answers.

    I would like to stress the need to avoid the term “man” and use “person” when referring to the Gingerbread Person (I do acknowledge that many people need this distinction and us as “more experienced” ones, need to address this)

    On the comparison of Spectrum vs Continuum (the official word used by Sam Killermann (see: https://www.genderbread.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/Breaking-through-the-Binary-by-Sam-Killermann.pdf) vs any other preferred word, the dictionary uses them -spectrum and continuum- as close synonyms, so, it’s mostly about what sounds better to the reader/audience than actually a difference that may imply anything different than the range between two poles per each dimension. In other words, I think that any word that describes the range is a good word.

    And last but not least, with regards the Unicorn, the GBP and others, I do tend to think that mostly all what we write (with the exception of original research) is based upon the works of somebody else. If we are making a difference and we are promoting awareness, let’s keep talking about it!

  3. Tami C 3 months ago

    Thank you Marianne!

    I appreciate your thoughtful input on such a complicated subject!

    Love to you!

  4. Jasmine Fletcher 3 months ago

    Thanks Marianne. Humans are way more complicated than simple binary descriptions or linear graphs could ever hope to describe.

    I will note I’ve read in the past that the genderbread “man” has been plagiarized : see the bottom of this page for example http://www.transstudent.org/gender/

  5. Cloe (CC) Webb 3 months ago

    Thank you Marianne. The gingerbread man represents 5 dimemsions of rhe human experience of which myriad more exist. Because of all the dimensions I really dont like the term spectrum as it implies a 2 dimensional representation that just adds fodder to the arguments of our detractors. We are beautifully complex beings. Interestingly enough, the representation is inclusive of those who are cis normative and heterosexual. Beautiful indeed.

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