I can relate to virtually everything posted here. It took me nearly 40 years to take the plunge and come out as a trans woman. I too had self harmed, attempted suicide many times and felt forced to live with a massive secret.
But no longer. I’ve been officially Melanie Jane for about 9 months now but have been living as a woman since February 2017.
I can remember staring longingly at women’s clothing in department stores, especially lingerie and stockings. I would wonder what it felt like to wear them. Well, now I know: Amazing! Liberating! The Real Me! I don’t have to hide anymore and I am no longer shuffling along under a heavy burden of guilt and shame that society was trying to force upon me.
They say that everything has its time and my time has only just begun. My mum is still struggling to accept me as her daughter but the rest of my family are getting on board with it. I have found an accepting church as well so I am happier right now than I have ever been.
Xx from Melanie