I pity the fool! As Mr. T would say; I pity the fool that wasn’t attracted to themselves. As several people have indicated; self-awareness to include attraction is an up and down thing. Not because you are on and off attracted to yourself, but because we are all busy. Multitasking has been shown to be a skill set that doesn’t really exist, everyone attends to one thing at a time. You may switch your attention quickly and smoothly, but people do not think of two things at a time.
I pity the fool that sincerely isn’t attracted to themselves, because that condition needs counseling, needs a better social support group, needs compassion. Truly never being attracted to yourself will lead to many social ills all the way to suicide. People do kill themselves, so this profound decision that one is unattractive does happen.
Research indicates that changes in appearance take 5 days to accept as the new normal for that person; that research was based on a study of woman getting a significantly different hair styling cut. That being said; most of us see ourselves many times over many years; by nature that becomes our normal. Slight enhancements, new cloths, whiter teeth, etc; lead to increased appreciation of self. Maybe we are only attractive a small piece of ourselves, but that is still us. In order to maintain a self-supportive version of mental health we must find ourselves attractive. If you don’t find yourself attractive; get help.
I myself, have always found at least something about me attractive. After I retired from the military after 34 years, I ballooned up to 270 lbs.; girl: let me tell you, that was one hard time to find myself attractive. But that was a good version of “unattractive”; I knuckled down and have since lost 70 of those lbs. I need to lose more and get down to the 175 lbs. I was in the military, but meanwhile I find myself more and more attractive everyday. Self-attraction gets us out of bed to exercise, try to improve our makeup skills, drives us to EnFemme for some sexy cloths. Self-attraction lets us walk down the street as a woman, unashamed, confident.
Eight months ago I started hormone replacement therapy; it was since then that I lost all that weight, it was since then that I restarted liking me and finding myself attractive. I remember walking across in front of our large bathroom mirror, and thinking how gross I looked. My whole life I was too busy to attend to my desire to be a girl, plus being born in 1952; it would be 50 years before any iota of social acceptance would occur. I retired at 66, and for the next two years did not take care of myself. I finally at 67 broke down and saw my doctor and cried for a hour explaining how I always wanted to be a girl. That was nine months ago.
I was unattractive to myself, and I sought help. I am so much happier now it is freaky. I brought a new bikini from Macy’s the other day, they fit, but I pouch out here and there a bit. I am going to fix those pouches; so a desire to be attractive to yourself is a good thing. I find myself attractive now, but I want to find myself much more attractive in the coming months and years. This whole discussion is about “Mental Health”. I don’t quite want to have sex with myself yet, but give me a year.
Lukcia Patricia Sullivan
I also love my name
I ramble on a lot, but I am a retired military doctor: doctors ramble on a lot!!