Reply To: How/when to “come out”


Hi.  I am 39 with a wife and 3 kids and have questioned my gender all my life and am looking to get therapy.

Lately I have felt depressed that I can’t express myself.  I feel like a balloon with air continously going in and if I don’t let it out it will pop. I am currently growing my hair out and am loving it.

My question to those who have/had a significant other and/or kids…when did you tell them (before/after therapy) and how did you tell them?

Seeking advice so my balloon doesn’t pop!



My advice to how you go about what you decide is the best route for you, nobody else can tell you what you should do. You will arrive at your path to transcend this situation.

The one and most important aspect are your thoughts, beliefs, and perceptions of yourself. If you can maintain a highly positive sense and feeling that this will go forward in a good way without conflict and pain, you begin to create that outcome. When you think about this, speak or write about it, use only positive words and only discuss it in that way. When you think about to outcome, try to feel in your mind and yourself how great you will feel when you come out the other side of this with great results and support. Know that you have the ability to create your own future. Everything that you think, say and write can and will have an influence on what happens for the rest of your life.

Perhaps, reflect on your life with that in mind and see if you can see how you have got to the point you are at now! It may be the way that you can connect with this in yourself. I write this on the basis of my own experiences and what I have learned from others and been taught.

I send you my love to help you take the right road for your future and that you will know which is the one to take


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