<p style=”text-align: left;”>Hi.</p>
<p style=”text-align: left;”>Thank you for the thread…All of your stories resonate with me wholeheartedly…from the attraction to women to envisioning you were the trans woman in the relationship to wanting to be with man who wants to please a woman.</p>
I have even migrated to looking looking at women in all different types of outfits thinking “I would wear that, and that and that, NOT that.” And when I am in that state I forget about what gender I was born and feel like me.
I am married with 3 kids and love my wife and don’t want to hurt her. I thought I would grow out of it, but nope…it just gets stronger and stronger and I am at the beginning stages of coming to grips with me and what I want to do.
I don’t think gender dysphoria has to be present 100% of the time to be trans…and there is NOTHING wrong with being Trans. Transgender is a wide spectrum of gender and does not have to be binary. You just have to be comfortable with you. The destination doesn’t need to be known to start the journey. How do you get from the Atlantic to the Pacific…head due west, but there are many roads you can take and sometimes you run into detours., and there are many scenic stops along way. Note that CIS Gender folks enjoy the Atlantic or Pacific and have no desires to dock the boat.
I recently accepted this and am still in the closet in my real life and it’s a LONELY place to live. I just need to take my own advice and start the engine in the car.
Lately I have been hurting inside with a full range of emotions occurring almost simultaneously since I have stopped denying that I at least fall somewhere in the Trans spectrum (probably the Pacific or somewhere in California).
Anyway, I hope this helps and puts some things in perspective. Like I say, it’s not easy but one needs to only do what’s right for them.