Reply To: On my way to the rest of my life, out and proud

DeeAnn Hopings


Sounds like things are going well and I’m very happy for you!

Regarding transitioning in place, I suggest that you check out Dr. Margaret Stumpp and Stephanie Battaglino. They both worked for major insurance companies, Prudential and New York Life, respectively, and were the first to transition in place at their companies. There were various articles written about Dr. Stumpp when she transitioned and Battaglino wrote a book a year or so ago: “Reflections from Both Sides of the Glass Ceiling”.

To me, coming out is a great unburdening process. I spoke at an event for International Women’s Day a couple of weeks ago and I discussed that a bit. Every time we come out to someone, it lessens that weight that we carry. Also important is the concept that we get to tell our story, our way. There is no substitute for it because, if we are outed, there is no reason to think that someone else can speak accurately to our truth and our reality.

I often remember quotes and sayings that speak to me. Rachel Maddow said:

“The single best thing about coming out of the closet is that nobody can insult you by telling you what you’ve just told them.”

Also, there is a line from a song by Des’ree:

“Time’s much too short to be livin’, somebody else’s life
I walk with dignity, I step with pride”

In both cases, words to live by, I think…

By the way, as an FYI, transgendered is not current usage. The implication is that something happened to us to make us transgender, which is not true. Also, we don’t say gayed or lesbianed.

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