I feel like I’m the odd duck on this one. Passing is vital to me, I’m not an activist, and I’m not here to change the world. I’m here for me. It sounds selfish, but here me out. The main reason it has taken me so long to start transitioning is because I am very harmony focused (INFP). I’ve seen people weaponize their Trans Identity in ways that have really soured those around me.
I come from a fairly conservative blue color family, and they make for a pretty good barometer of what is palatable. I’ve seen over the years how Gay and Lesbian relations have become accepted through none aggressive normalization. My dad used be pretty homophic when I was young, do to much of the “We’re Here, We’re Queer, Get Use To It” mentality of the time. All people are tribal, and this is an aggressive act against then Societal Norms. People In the Gay community doing outlandish thigs to “Own the Squares” Only made things worse for everyone that wasn’t and extremist. Then Will and Grace happened, it was my dad’s favorite show. It was humanizing to see same sex attracted people in everyday life. Now my dad’s best friends are the gay neighbors.
I now not everyone can pass, but feel we could bridge the divide better with more Mathilda Hogbergs and less GameStop Ma’ams. When I come out, hopefully the only people that will know are those I’ve told, and hopefully the knowledge that that otherwise normal woman was one a man will soften their views on trans people. Integration begets Acceptance at least as fair as I’ve experienced.