Reply To: So many layers!

DeeAnn Hopings


My situation is different from most here. I don’t think that I have ever felt that I was in the wrong body. But, what took me many decades to understand was that I’ve never felt completely male or completely female. I have always been this amalgam for male and female energies, perspectives, like/dislikes, etc. Once I figured that out, many things began to make sense as I looked back at my life. I recognize that I am an outlier and that’s OK. I think it works to reinforce the idea that while we all have similarities, there are some distinct differences in how and why our paths develop as they do.

While I have no plans to do hormone replacement or affirmation surgeries, I present as DeeAnn about 98% of the time. It is how I am known here. DeeAnn is the person of record for the 5 organizations where I hold office and 3 other organizations where I am a member, but hold no office. Very few here have ever met Don.

There are a few situation where I do not present as DeeAnn. My driver’s license says Don and when we went to get our initial 2 vaccines I didn’t want people to be confused as to why my presentation didn’t match the photo. Where we went was an hour away from where we live, so it was a bit of a question mark. Subsequently our boosters have been here close to home, so it was DeeAnn that went.

In the interest of brevity, I won’t go into my coming out process, but it was very different from the majority of people here. What’s important, I believe, is to sort out what we need to do and recognize that there is no Right Way to go about things. It is all about what fits and what makes sense to us.

Funny thing about dressing. Early on I wore girdles or panties with pads. For me, eventually it became more trouble than it was worth. I have a fairly good size butt as it is, so shapewear seemed less important. However I always wear some significantly sized breast forms. Sort of completes the old lady look (I’m 73)! But, I am adamant about always leaving the house with full makeup and being nicely dressed. No ripped jeans, no low cut or back out tops, etc. My only vice is short skirts and short skorts that sit at 6”-7” above the knee.

I may be old, but I ain’t dead yet!

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