Reply To: Crossdresser or Transgender

Dana Munson

Travis, I agree with many of the other ladies in this thread. You don’t just wake up one day and say “Oh, I think I’ll become a woman.”  Like some here, I was an off-and-on crossdresser in my early years. I knew I was super attracted to things feminine, and I knew (this was in the 1960s and ’70s) that there was a theoretical pathway to womanhood. But it was just not a socially accepted life path at that time. (Not that crossdressing was exactly  celebrated, but getting caught with a pair of your mom’s or sister’s panties invited nowhere near the trauma that would result from telling your parents they had a daughter, not a son.) So I spent many years denying the woman in me, telling myself I could be “normal,” or failing that, just be an occasional crossdresser.  But as the years went by, the crossdressing didn’t help – in fact, it made the longing worse. But by the time I could face what I truly was, I was married and had kids – vows and commitments I absolutely would not upset or dishonor.  But now, years later, with the kids grown and gone, and with my wife in late stages of dementia, the woman in me will no longer be denied.  I am on my way at last!  My point in telling you all this, Travis, is that transitioning from a male to a female role is not easy, not cheap, and definitely not something to do just because you think you might like it. It’s something you do because something in you is screaming that you NEED this.  So if you are in a genuine “am I or aren’t I” mode, find a gender therapist and work through this with him/her. You may find that you are fine just as you are. Or maybe there really is a woman within you.

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