Hi Catherine, reading your post brought me to tears, although I’ve always cried easily, what you’ve shared really struck a chord with me. I am a transwoman, something I’ve been aware of since a young child. I’m actually in the process of writing a book about my journey as Lauren, so I’ve been doing a lot of digging into my past. I’ve always been a very sensitive person, and when I was young, like you, was also judged and criticized. I was the first born son, as such I was an absolute failure, never even coming close to what was expected of me, and on top of that, I was feminine in nature which might as well have been the kiss of death! Growing up knowing I was supposed to be a girl always made life a challenge, but I survived and, finally, last year, I released Lauren to live her life as a free woman.
I survived because I knew and believed in who I was. I always believed that a time was coming when I would be able to become and live as the true person I am, a trans woman named Lauren. Today I am living that life, and even though it has hardships it is a life full of so much joy!
You write of speaking to yourself, believing in yourself, clinging to hope and confidence.
The one thing that makes everyday life so much easier for a trans woman, is to face each day being confident in who we are! That self confidence is one of the best strengths we have as we live our lives in the midst of a world that often tries to deny we even exist.
Thank you Catherin for sharing, for baring your very heart and soul with us.
Ms. Lauren M