Reply To: Trans Etiquette

#133694
Dana Munson
SILVER

Brielle, I just read your post. I hope your transition is going well!  I am a few months into my own transition. I have thus far been extremely fortunate in the level of acceptance I have received from family and friends (I must have done something awfully right in some prior life!).  Everyone has gotten pretty good at calling me “Dana” (instead of “Dan”), but once in a while, someone will slip up and refer to me as “he” or “guy.”  They don’t mean anything rude, I’m sure, and often they catch themselves and apologize.  It’s just that after years of knowing me one way, they’ve suddenly got to turn on a dime and start calling me something else. I get it.  Hey, before my transition, when I talked to my dogs, I would sometimes refer to myself as “Daddy.” Months into transition, I still sometimes slip and say “Daddy” instead of “Momma.”  Just an ingrained habit that’s slow dying.

Brielle, I totally am with you in not being called “Mom” or “Mother” by my kids. When I came out, I told them they could call me “Dana” or “Aunt Dana” or whatever . . . just not “Mom” or “Mother.”  Although she’s going through a terminal illness, they have already have a one-and-only Mother. No way do I wish to intrude on her special title or position.

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