At one time or another, MANY here have been. We try to balance our lives between what we need, what those around us need and other circumstances in play. I suspect that if you put the question about balancing their lives to 100 trans people, you would probably get 100 different answers. It is very difficult when there is no real right or wrong answer. It comes down to what fits your set of circumstances the best and that’s why it is different from person to person.
One of the continuing problems in the community is isolation. Humans are social creatures and it is a difficult situation when when we don’t have others to talk with, laugh with, commiserate with and be ourselves with. It is very important to see ourselves replicated in society, and for others to see us, but that isn’t always possible.
While Des Moines is not super metropolitan area, have you found any LGBT groups near you? Note that since the pandemic many LGBT centers have implemented online support and social groups. I suggest that you do some searching around to see what is available.
In many cases, a proactive approach serves better than a passive one. You can search for members who may be close to your area by clicking on Social in the menu and then Member Directory.
Let us know what you find.