Jayde, my heart goes out to you. Your situation is so difficult and you both seem to have it together and are being honest to each other and open in your feelings. I understand your concerns regarding the urge returning. I understand her position she married a man, not a woman. I understand you must feel why do you have to make the sacrifices and accept you cannot be who you really are. Why can’t see accept that? You seem to be willing to give it all up to protect the union. Maybe with many discussions, you can come to some middle ground whereby you can maybe leave town for a specified amount of time and release you if possible for example. You both deserve to have happiness. Keep the discussions centred around happiness; how can each of you make some sacrifices and still find a level of happiness that will be acceptable to you both. I wish you both success.