Reply To: Getting Connected With The Trans Community…

DeeAnn Hopings

Thank You for sharing your story! One of the points that it made for me is how we need different things at different times in our lives. It isn’t a constant. It evolves because we as people evolve.

Another thing that came through is a need that we often have to try to create this younger version of ourselves due to what we missed. I have no idea of exactly how this worked out for you, but I think it drives what we sometimes see as inappropriate dress (at least somewhat) among trans women. Note that I am not absolving myself in this regard as the vast majority of my skirts, skorts and shorts are well above the knee at the age of 74. To paraphrase Rhett Butler: Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a shit.

As I’ve said before, we Hu-Mans are social creatures and that sociability has many different functions. I think one of the most important things is to be seen as we want to be seen and have that reflected back to us. Gender identity is a mental construct, so it stands to reason that we desire to have our social lives align with that.

I think that eventually the desire for hyperfemininity does dissipate quite a bit; perhaps because it isn’t really sustainable. As time goes on we settle into our more mature selves and Life continues.

One final point to be made is how the community relates to our progress. At various times in your life, you reconnected with the community, or at least a subset of it. The important thing is that when you needed to come back, the community was still there. Our needs are not constant. They come and go, but like a river, the community remains.

Be Well and Continued Progress!

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