Breaks my heart hearing your struggles. It is very hard to dig out of the hole. A lot of us was in the same position at 30; do not give up hope. You have so much more life left to find that X-Factor that will allow you to lose that fear of hopelessness. I know a popular Pricher that supports Trans folks (rock and roll man out of Texas) and has a good following on FB. I also know a priest that is like us. So, you do not need to repent because you are who you are. Your physical brain is not the same. Your DNA gender marker may not be the same even; most do not even know about XXY gender marker or how sometimes organs in the body are never found. If so, there is still a lot of extra DNA markers that are discarded as unknowns and are normal for most people; they don’t do nothing. I don’t think you made you. For you not to be you and flourish as the universe expects would be a sin. The construct of man is often to control what you are and how you act. And, it is nice when the church makes the man in charge, and it is overused by a lot of controlling men; you know what they say about power. MY bad (off topic) my ADHD is bad today.
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