Jon,
there is a lot of help out there for you.. Do some google searches specific to your issues. seek out free legal aid council. You can contact local ss admin to get a copy of your number. Just be careful at home. Its a delecate situation and its likely to grow.
You could try to suggest to your mom you want /need therapy, which is covered by insurance .. what you discuss is totally confidential, including matters of dealing with parents. they can help you navigate now and in the future. Dr’s therapists etc cannot discuss anything due to hippa, but your dad will see claim forms being processed by ins. co. That could be why your mom wants you to talk to him.
also, ask around in chat… there are many who have a wealth of knowledge and licensed psychologists too who can offer advice.
best of luck,
Jessica