Please complete your Profile page and also do an Introduction message in a separate thread. It helps other members understand your situation better, what your goals are, issues that you are dealing with, etc.
Also, note that we have a sister site, CrossDresserHeavan.com. As you begin to think about how all this sits for you if you are a crossdresser or a transgender people, that will determine which site may be more helpful. Also, a number of members are on both sites and the reasoning may be different. I found CrossDresserHeaven first and after a while I joined TransgenderHeaven. I’m on both sites these days but most of my time is spent here. I maintain the other membership as I often share the things that I have learned about clothing design, sizing, accessorizing, etc.
Given your situation, it may be helpful to seek a therapist to work with. Many here have done that and found it to be very helpful for developing an understanding of how things really sit for them and beginning to work through possible steps for the future. The problem is that considering our gender identity is difficult. We know that there is the possibility of considerable upheaval in our lives, our families and our work situations. Because of all the fear and worry, we avoid thinking about what our gender identity may be. A therapist can help to keep us focused and thinking about what we need to think about. But, it is important to find a therapist who has experience in gender issues as not everyone does.