Not sure if I replied to this long ago or not, but all wives I am sure ask their trans partner that question. My answer has changed over the years, twenty years ago, I know right OMG, I am only 21 like for last last 10 years like my mom always was, but enough of that. My knee jerk answer in the beginning was ‘no’, over time, about 14 years ago it was ‘yes’ and I want to transition, now my answer is ‘I always was’ a girl just in weird body. The motivation for the original no was of course that I did not want to hurt her feelings, as well as she said a yes answer is a separation answer, plus I was not 100% sure myself. I changed over time and grew up and became more sure of self. When I made the mental decision that I was a girl in the wrong body and want to transition 14 years ago, and told her so it started the whole roller coaster. Now I generally do not think about wanting to be a girl at all I just know it is so and it has freed up a ton of self questioning.