Reply To: Out

#140633

Seems like there is a bit of narcissism involved with her and she is using her religion to avoid facing the fact she is a bigot. Harsh but it happens, my very supportive ex-partner had very strong views on such people imposing their values on others.
It’s a hard place to be either you are unhappy and she accepts the relationship or you put yourself first and all that entails.

I offer two thoughts;
1. Seek medical opinion especially regarding your mental health. Breakdowns take a very long time to get over and even longer to recover the damage they cause to your life. Take heed of what they tell you. Your wife should know you’re seeking help but keep specifics quiet to avoid skewing the process – this can be very bad.
2. Once you know how deep the issues are and your medical options you need to consider what YOU want/need to do. Ideally you should discuss this together but it may be that she isn’t prepared to negotiate. It happens. A friend and his wife split a few weeks after their youngest graduated university, they’d hidden the truth at cost to their health and finances, the daughter didn’t react well to this news as she blamed herself. Things change and sometimes relationships aren’t as strong as they were.

When I split with my first partner both families were sticking their noses in with ‘advice’ we had simply grown apart. In the end we told everybody to go away split our belongings sold what we no longer wanted and paid about £200 total in legal fees. To this day her Mum is convinced I took advantage of the situation despite being told repeatedly that was not the case. Irrational beliefs trump knowledge in many people.
Best of luck.

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