From what you just wrote to me, I would very much encourage you to watch Dr. Z, PhD on Utube. With what you feel, and the fears you have, I believe what she has recorded will do a lot for you. I haven’t become a subscriber to her site, so I don’t listen to her new posts, but many of her past posts have been helpful. I wish you all the best, and feel free to write to me again. I’m now 2+ years on estrogen and almost seven months post vaginoplasty. I needed to get through many of the concerns you have to get to the wonderful place I am now. But each of us is unique, so I do not urge you to go looking for any templates to follow. Listening to the experiences of others and the counsel of those trained in the subject will be very helpful to you.