Reply To: Kids… Should they get gender affirming surgery, take HRT, etc?

Elli Snow

I am curious what you mean by parents should be in charge of the narrative.  What part do you think they should be in charge of, and what part should be left to the decision of the child?

Personally, I think the only thing parents should have a veto on is surgery, and I don’t think any teen has enough growth or experience to make a good choice at that age.  The brain isn’t fully developed until somewhere in the early 20s.  We don’t consider 18 years old people responsible enough or educated enough to consume alcohol.

I don’t have any issue with a kid deciding he would rather wear dresses or she would rather dress like and hang out with the boys.  I don’t have an issue with HRT for either MtF or FtM, because it’s something like 95%+ reversible should they decide not to continue, and about 2% of those that start HRT decide not to continue it.

However, surgery is a whole different bag of worms, and I think anyone considering it should have some real life experience away from schools and cliques before making an decision that’s can’t be undone.  Would I stop my 18 year old child from getting SRS at that age?  No, but I would try my most eloquent best to encourage them to wait a couple years.  Learn more about the real world and how they feel about it before making a choice that can’t be reversed.  Learning to deal with and appreciate delayed gratification is something I wish I had known at 20 instead of not learning it and understand it’s benefits until I was past 50.  This is one of those things I thing should be taught in school, along with rational thinking,  learning how to do research and learning to recognize when someone is feeding you a line of bull, but we don’t seem to teach any of these things any more.

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