Reply To: Settling Into Our Lives…


I voted better for several reasons.

Born intersex, and as a teen I had no family support/understanding when I first noticed myself. I was diagnosed with partial androgen insensitivity syndrome (hormone imbalance) at age 18 after developing gynecomastia at age 13 (and other physical issues). I was a closet crossdresser off and on and tried/began to transition when I was 30 but stopped (no local support or internet) and got married instead. I had been a workaholic until I recently retired. Since then I continued my crossdressing until during Covid when my hormone imbalance became more active and I became more depressed. As depression set in and I began to feel more mixed emotions, along with hot flashes and times of sadness (crying). I knew I needed help. I knew I needed to completely transition. I am surprised how fast (and easy) parts of myself and my life changed in the last year.

I found a great therapist who assured me I’m a female. She said I’ve been living as a trans-woman for all these years acting and dressing like a male. I’m my true self all the time except in front of my wife. My medical team supports me 100% as a woman. I got my ears pierced. I began HRT. I got my first mammogram. My top has filled out more. I’ve let my hair grow out. I’m learning makeup. When I go out alone I present as my true self. All of this has moved faster than I expected.

I am trying to be more outgoing as a trans-woman but my wife does not understand me (she hates that I need to wear a bra). I go out with friends to local transgender support groups and support PFLAG meetings. I try to zoom with other support groups.

In general, Missouri politics and St. Louis are not LGBTQI+ friendly but we have some good support organizations that help.


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