Reply To: How to Finance Transition

Brenda Leigh


Hi Stephanie,

What are the costs??? Dr Chettawutt in Thailand just quoted me just under $13,000.00 for Vaginaplasty and $4,800.00 for Breast Augmentation with a discount if I do them both at the same time. Facial Feminization, I have not gotten a chance to look over his numbers yet but he does all aspects of feminizing surgeries. That’s roughly 1/3rd of the cost of the quotes I have received from doctors in the U.S.A.. If I go to Thailand for surgery I will also have the cost of air fare, hotel for 18 days while healing, food and incidentals. Plus, if there’s a problem with my surgeons work God forbid, I would need to fly back to Thailand or pay an American doctor to help. If I do surgery here in Scottsdale, AZ. , I’m very close to home, which is something I like since I’m pretty much alone, and I’m not traveling to a foriegn country. One other thing to remember!! Since I am sold support for my household, I just make sure there’s plenty of money available to pay household bills while I’m in surgery and recuperating, I would guess 3 to 6 months. It feels like an impossible thing to do at this point in my life but I’m really at the point where I can no longer live with myself in my body as it is. And I really understand how you feel about feeling cute in your jeans!! I still have a cute butt too, but no hips, no curves, I get compliments on my butt often from guys but I know they have their own agenda on their minds… And, no matter what I do, how well I learn to apply make up, I just don’t have any feminine facial features!!! And my upper torso and arms are way too big for a woman!! I really HATE my body, and I always have all my life and like you there’s no turning back. I sometimes think I’m making a mistake with all of this, like it seems an impossible task to achieve a feminine outcome. I’m in therapy now, I’m doing electrolysis to finally did myself of my pesky beard shadow and finally have no need of shaving 3 times a day but it’s not enough. And of course I have the Aphrodite Breast Forms and the Jolie Hip & Butt Pads, glue it all on with Hollister Adhesive but I feel so phoney wearing that crap. It’s hot here in Arizona, I literally sweat the forms off my chest even with Stay Dry, and it’s impossible to make a breast form blend to your chest and make them look like real breasts!! I think they must spray paint the models in the advertisements!! And after 6 months of trial and error, I called the Breast Form Store where I bought it all and told them I could not make any of it blend with my skin and eliminate the “seam/line” around the form to look like a breast, and got no help. They already had my money and that was that!!! Everything from forms to clothing to HRT to surgery is geared to take ALL your money!!!! Without giving anything in the way of support afterwards!! I know I sound bitter and I apologize for venting on your shoulder right now but I am so frustrated with everything trans right now!! I did not choose to be transgender, I have been all my life. I chose to try to block it out of my mind to many years but it returned with a vengeance and has knocked me to my knees. I actually had become so depressed, felt so much anxiety several nights ago, I considered ending it all by ending my life. I did not ask for this, I did not choose it, but it’s my reality and it’s not fun experiencing constant rejection, constant looks because I dress feminine, heading the constant remarks because I don’t look female. But I am what I am and I cannot help it, I cannot change it, and simply dressing female no longer feeds my need to be female. I don’t know how I will ever afford to transition, I am finding it more and more difficult to get thru my daily life now as a physical man and my only avenue to raise the money would be to sell my house which I don’t want to do. And, should not have to do!!!

Well, Thanks Stephanie for being the one person to answer my Post, I think there are far too many people who consider themselves Transgender who are actually Crossdressers who experience NO Gender Dysphoria, have never seen a Psychiatrist or Gender Therapist and simply can’t relate to the intensity of the feelings I am experiencing, so they are not able to answer something like this. I may make a few enemies bit so he it. Thanks again and I really hope and pray all works in your favor. I understand!!

hugs Brenda

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