Reply To: Big day tomorrow with wife.


Big day was big. The ride to the city was awkward and she side stepped any overatures. Already blue when I dropped her at school I went to a park and cried for an hour. Oh god self pity disgusts me though and I did put on my big girl pants, washed my face and went and did as many pretty things as I could to break my funk. I shopped every clothing store in a big mall. I got, do you call it clocked? Several times when I let out a wee gasp at a nice skirt. Even refused service just looking for long skirts by an obviously religious sales girl. Told me find someone else 😂. Still very blue when I walked in Macy’s. I was looking at foundation. And a color pallet the help deemphasize the  contours to a more fem look. The makeup girls came over and said hi and could they help me? I told them what is happening. That at sixty I wished to become a pro with makeup. Next thing I knew they were doing a color pallet for me. And signed me up for a glam makeup class in two weeks but best of all Lilly loved my idea of video tutorials for us older and tougher looking girls and next week we will discuss it. It was a great day in so many ways that promoted positive things. But the lingering unspoken with my partner was a shadow.

Our ride home was the same until we got near home. She said “well it sounds like you felt pretty today, I am happy. We came home and I talked about the clothes I saw. We did clay masked together and had a good evening. I believe in our love. And even if it gets rough for a patch we will survive this change.

And with that Maria is becoming known to my girls and accepted. Over the next 2-2.5yrs she will emerge fully as HRT works. And we segue into presenting as a Lesbian couple. We will survive this and be stronger for it.

Mans with that I hope Manic Maria can turn down and quit flying around emotionally. Thank you for the space to do so. Gotta a lot of me work to do so am gonna stay off the net except to research my plan of treatment and such. My real work begins today loves.

Ciao for now Maria

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