Welcome Candice. You’re in a tough spot…that so many of us have been in. It’s best to be open and honest with your spouse as early as possible, then make sure to listen to her concerns and fears. A lot of spouses can’t handle it and that’s fair. You want to make sure that the friendship and the communication are as strong as ever to be able to handle it all the best you can, together. I don’t believe it needs to be a fight just because you’re realizing you’re not the person you thought you were.
Best of luck. Let me know if you want to chat.