Reply To: Height, heels, broad shoulders etc…

Carly Holloway


Hi, Vanessa.  I’m also a very tall girl,, 6’2″, and I am making the transition.   I, too, was scared to death to begin with height and physique not entirely in the female mold (that’s a delicate way to put it.)  To top it off, I’m in my late 60’s.

I decided to go for it anyway.   Not an easy choice for any of us.   I studied the way women in my area dress regularly, and worked hard to mimic their styles.  I noticed that, outside of random her formal work situations (business, execs, official/govt/court situations, etc), not many ladies wear heels and dresses….maybe for a fancy night  out, but usually not even then.

So, when I’m on the go, I’m very much one of the crowd, aside from height and size.  My observations?   Nobody really cares anymore.  Sure, I may get a few goofy stares, but I have had zero negative encounters in many months.  I’m mostly treated like everybody else.  Shopping, restaurants, work, outings (of course limited by our friendly neighborhood covid), no problem.   Usually ma’am or miss.  A few bums say sir, but that is not the rule.  And bear in mind I live in the heart of redneck fundamentalist Oklahoma in a small, small community.

Finding the moxie to finally go ahead with my transition was the hard part.   Making the transition has been a delight, and I wish I could have found the courage years ago.

So, I say, go ahead.  Experiment.  Observe.  Try some jeans, tees or tunics, and tennies or flops.  Start small and easy.  You won’t see many 3 inch heels and fancy dress at 2 in the afternoon, or at 8 pm.  Just be comfortable.  Be confident.  Be proud.  Be yourself.  They don’t dictate your life.  You don’t need their approval or advice.  Head up, shoulders back.  You’re beautiful just as you are in your own way.  Own it.  Enjoy it.  Express it.  Above all, be relaxed and have fun.   Life is too short to hide behind fear of “them” and what they think.

I hope this helps.   You are not alone, hon.

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