Reply To: Newbee here

DeeAnn Hopings

Lol, was a mechanical engineer for years and now work in home maintenance and landscape design and build. There is a club “Pink Punters” I’ve never been. I would like to but I’m quite a loner, I work alone, live alone, and I’m not being funny but I have no friends. Mainly due to once I’ve finished for the day its my time. Time for me to be me and relax. My home is a little unusual as I live on a boat and have joggers walkers canoeists dog walkers and other “boaters” lol, so I come home change and sit. Now I type this I see I’m quite sad about it all.


At our core, we are social creatures. That’s why we develop relationships with other Hu-Mans. It is natural for us to do that. So, being among other Hu-Mans is could be a useful thing for you.

There is a personality evaluation tool known as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. Basically it is a bunch of questions aimed at seeing where you fall in terms of ones personality traits. There are 4 couplets, but the one I want to mention is the Introvert/Extrovert. The numerical scale for all of the couplets is 1 to 6. It’s done like that so that you can’t score dead center. I’ve taken the test maybe 6 times over my career. Regarding the Introvert/Extrovert couplet, I typically score a 3 or a 4, meaning that I am close 50/50. While I am quite gregarious, other times I am very content to keep my own company. Anyway, the point is the my introverted side understands exactly what you mean.

For a bit over 2 years I was a board member for our local trans group. During the course of a year, we would do informational tables at events 6 or 7 times a year. Each day was on the order of 5 or 6 hours. I enjoyed talking to people, telling them about the organization and responding to their questions, but at the end of the day I was dead tired. For me, it took extra energy to be that outgoing for that long. It would just deplete my energy resources.

So, let me propose a strategy. I’m guessing that the group meeting is 2 hours. Make an agreement with yourself to stay for 30 minutes. If the environment doesn’t feel good or you don’t feel uncomfortable after 30 minutes, get up and leave. If it is OK to stay, give yourself another 30 minutes, and decide again, etc. Each of the time check points acts as decision point. Further, you are deciding if you feel comfortable and not on staying or going because you have already decided the course of action based on what you think about the environment.

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