I think, like a lot of us, the story starts from one of my earliest memories.
I was dared by my brother to wear some of my mums tights, I must have been about 10, as soon as I tried them on it was like a click inside my head. It felt so right
Since then over the years I hid my dressing with such a feeling of guilt and self hatred, I was only ever caught as a child and never told anyone in my adult years.
Partners and kids come along and I pushed the feeling down, denying what I am feeling.
My depression only getting worse, until I am feeling suicidal. Banruptcy, divorce, death of my parents as a young age, all not helping my feelings.
Now aged 47 and after several years of counselling I have dealt with a lot of issues, now I have got to deal with this.
So told my partner about my dressing, expecting her to explode. But surprisingly she didn’t, she doesnt understand but she isn’t running away which is a good thing.
Now the question is where am I on this spectrum and what would help me be happy within myself. Do I go all the way and transition or am I content with just dressing in the house or somewhere in between. I know no one can answer this but me
Well thats the high and low lights of my life