Anxiety

[Randi St john]

<p class=”p1″><span class=”s1″>I am a trans man (MTF), recent top surgery only. I am athletic and like going to the gym and am having anxiety about using the men’s locker room. Even prior to my surgery I had harassment incident. Wondering if I should now, given my boobs,<span class=”Apple-converted-space”>  </span>use the women’s lockers room ?<span class=”Apple-converted-space”>  </span>I have a girlfriend and she seems uncomfortable about me doing that, what should I do </span><span class=”s2″>😩😩</span><span class=”s1″>?</span></p>

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𝕋𝕖𝕣𝕣𝕚 𝔸𝕟𝕟𝕖🌸

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[𝕋𝕖𝕣𝕣𝕚 𝔸𝕟𝕟𝕖🌸]

Hello Randi,

Welcome to our TransGender Heaven (TGH) site: A Transgender Support Site. We are a wonderful, accepting, loving, helpful community where you can be safe and be yourself.

You can read about the knowledge and experiances of others on a similar path by reading articles and in the forums and chatting in chat rooms.
My hope is that you will become comfortable here and make many new friends.
Glad you are here. Looking forward to seeing you on the site.
Terri Anne, Ambassador

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[Melissa Martell]

I am finally starting to transition. As soon as I get the gender marker on my Connecticut driver’s license changed to Female this Thursday I will be dressing in only womens clothes  FOREVER. Then I will petition the court to legally change my name to Melissa. My middle name will change to Joan which was my late wife’s first name. I am kind of honoring her and I okayed it with her sisters. Last name will remain unchanged. I will be changing everything, registrations, bank accounts, credit cards, deed to my house, etc. Once the court approves my name change, I will demand that everyone address me by my legal name, Melissa. No one will dare call the police and say there’s a man in the ladies room since it will be “Female” on my driver’s license.

We’ll it’s nice to meet you. tell me about yourself.

Hugs, Melissa

1 user thanked author for this post.

Toni Floria

[Steffanie Wiley]

Hello Randi

The thing being considered here can be a serious issue when you’re out in the everyday world. Your attitude or your friend’s attitude may need to be adjusted to fit what you are doing and how you present yourself to the world. If you are presenting as a woman, then you would need to use the women’s restroom. If you are presenting as a man, then you should use the men’s restroom. Then when you’re in there, just take care of business as needed. After washing your hands, say, in the women’s, then you could do some touch up on make up or comb your hair.  I can understand the anxiety involved but after a while of using those facilities it can get better for you.  And this may sound kind of not caring,  but try to not let one bad incident keep you from going thru the correct door. You can overcome that!  Keeping in mind what you went in there for can help get you through it as well as keeping to yourself as you work through the process. I know some places I have been have had a sketchy look  to them and I have avoided using their facilities if at all possible. Some times you can get a feel for how “safe” a restroom might be by the customers you see in the business. Then some times you just can’t avoid not going to the restroom. Other times I know where I’m going and I get the restroom useage out of the way before I go to that one store or business.  Or I go to some of my usual places as before.  Any more with me it’s second nature to get to the women’s room if I need to.  And anyone with me understands which one I’ll be using.  So that’s my 2 cents on that and I hope it helps in some way! Good luck with your plans and take care! You can make it happen!

 

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Toni Floria

[Author]

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