Body image

[Dawn J]

Hi Ladies,

Looking for some advice.

I’m not getting any younger and, as I age, I’m seeing things going on with my body, that I’m not too thrilled about. I’m wondering if any of you have any suggestions.

HAIR – I’m growing it out, but my wife keeps telling me that I don’t have the right kind of hair for that. I’ll admit that it’s fine, but it’s also thinning on top. I know that some of you would suggest that HRT can thicken hair, but I don’t think my wife would be happy with the other effects of HRT.

FACE – I’ve had a couple of blepharoplasties to address sagging eyelids & bags under the eyes, but I need a facelift. Unfortunately, that’s cost-prohibitive. Isn’t it ironic that I could get HRT & SRS fully paid for, but not a facelift?

CHEST – I would love to develop my breasts, but again, HRT is probably not an option. Implants? I think my wife would actually enjoy them– but only if I can hide them when I have to be in male mode. I’m also not happy with the wrinkles I’m beginning to see in my decolletage.

WAIST – Is this just part of getting older? I walk, run, bike, exercise, play ball. My weight is good, but I have a roll that I can’t seem to get rid of. In fact, it seems to be getting worse. Do I need to get liposuction?

ARMS & LEGS – They’re toned, but are beginning to show the wrinkles, veins & crepey-ness that you’d see on an old lady. How do I nip that in the bud?

I missed out on being that hot 25-year old woman that I should have been. Even though 25 is in my rear-view mirror, is there any reason that I can’t look it & make up for lost time?

Thanks,

Dawn

[Alexandria (AKA Alex)]

Hi Dawn, as you say HRT is a step toward these things. I read your profile and how difficult it is, and has been for you. I guess you are at something of a crossroads and your wife is central to what you can do next. Absolutely central.
My wife divorced me 2yrs ago when I was no longer the man she married, now she is my sister and my best friend…and helps me so much…as a woman.
My point is there is often more than one way to become yourself and get what you need. Perhaps move the goalposts. I will say if you get some hitech answers…please share!
Just my thoughts given with a hug.
Alex x

[DeeAnn Hopings]

Dawn:

You have some interesting questions and they are certainly things to think about as we age. One all encompassing thought is that things are never going to match our expectations exactly, so it becomes a question of what we can live with.

Hair: I don’t have a lot of hair, so my initial thought was to wear wigs. I did that for a couple of years until I retired and moved to the SoCal desert. With 122F temperatures sometimes in the Summer, wigs are not a good alternative.That led me to wearing hats and baseball caps. I cut my hair pretty short and it works. On occasion I’ve even been referred to as The Hat Lady. I thing the moral to the story is that if we have thinning hair or baldness, our options are limited.

Skin: I’ll lump all of the skin related thing together. My understanding is that a lot of what happens, or doesn’t happen, to our skin is related to hydration (internally and externally). Internally has to do with our water intake. I don’t remember what the recommended amount per day is, but it can be found online. Externally it has to do with using moisturizing lotions. It will also help with the skin maintaining its suppleness.

Chest: That is a tricky one. There was a thread here about disguising ones breast growth before transition due to her work situation. It’s a bit of a tough situation as everyone’s body shape and mass distribution are different. As an experiment, get a set of the size forms that you would like to be and the appropriate size bra. While wearing them, see what you can do in terms of disguising your breast projection: loose shirts, t-shirts, etc. Also be aware that what works in cooler weather may not work for summertime.

Waist: One thing you didn’t mention was going to a gym. Their trainers can suggest particular exercises and help make sure that you are executing them correctly for best effect.

Let us know what you learn along the way and Good Luck!

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