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In the last few weeks, I have been struggling with gender dysphoria more than I ever have before. So I came out to my therapist last week to try to help wrap my head around what I have been feeling. I have been seeing her for my anxiety and depression but had not confided in my gender issues. I really never have allowed myself to truly deal with the emotions and the years of repression that kept and keeps me closeted. But after getting staycation from work and getting to express and dress as Michelle along with the amazing support from my wife has given me the courage to finally open up to another person.
I did not mean to out myself and it was toward the end of the session when I was mentioning my feelings about my absence from the support sites (CDH and TGH) that have been pivotal in getting to where I am now. I gave her a very brief version of my story. I tend to try to express big things softly so I told her I was feeling a bit gender dysphoric. I couldn’t believe how I said as if I was saying I was having an off day. Trust is hard for me so I tend to downplay things. Her response was so affirming and compassionate. She smiled and told me thank you for telling her and that she felt honored that I was comfortable in telling her. She’s been my therapist since the fall so I have been wondering how to approach it and in my typical fashion I blundered into it. I have a few weeks before my next session with her and will be curious what will be next. Thanks for reading….
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