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Hi. I’m very much in the closet. Not just because of what others would think about me, but because I am not sure myself. At times, I’m sure I what to transition, and will feel like that for weeks/months. Other times I’m content to live as a male. But the want to transition always comes back.
I think I need to explore me feminine side more, starting off small, baby steps. I’ve cross-dressed around home when I was alone, gone for drives, walks downtown, but that’s been it. No real social interaction with other people, aside from passing them on the street.
I’m not going to get into too much intimate detail as this isn’t the place for it, but about a year ago, my partner basically dropped a suggestion that I cross-dress in the bedroom, though at the time I was in “I want to be a man mode”, and passed on the suggestion. Also when I shaved off all my body-hair, she asked me if I was trying to be more feminine. I didn’t answer, but she left it at that and didn’t give me any grief about it. And this is hard to put into words without getting graphic, but when we are intimate, she often caresses me more as if I was a female than a male, if that makes sense.
Anyhow, I was folding the laundry, and noticed a bralette that I’d never seen before, unusual for her because she only wears push up bras and sport’s bras. I asked if it was hers, and she said yes. So I folded it up and left it on her dresser. When I crawled into bed, and turned down the comforter, I saw that it had been placed under my pillow. I don’t see how it would accidentally end up there, or why it would be placed under my pillow? So is this a hint, or am I reading too much into it?
My partner is quite open-minded, so I know she wouldn’t end the relationship If I brought it up. I’m confident the absolute worst case scenario with her would simply be she couldn’t share this with me.
So any suggestions on how I should talk to her about it?
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