Do I NEED a vagina?

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    • #25596

      Hi all πŸ™‚

      So I’m going to be starting HRT soon which is great.

      I’m very happy that I will be losing hair and gaining hair, changing face and body shape and growing breasts however I am not too bothered about getting a vagina.

      If I could have surgery right now I would lose the testes but having a penis doesn’t bother me. Nobody ever sees it but me and it’s useful in peeing.

      Is this likely to change after time on HRT?

       

      Katie πŸ™‚

    • #25601

      I don’t think you necessarily β€œneed” anything. What you need is to be comfortable in your own skin. If money wasn’t an issue, I would jump on the idea of GCS. For now, I’ll take the changes that I can get on HRT and live my life the way I want to. At some point, I do feel that i would be very inclined to have GCS, until then I’m more worried about getting through college (round 2) and getting my other finances in order.

      • #32341

        Skyler: It’s cool you and I have the similar goal of getting through college. Nice. My partner works for the state of Minnesota in College Administration. There’s some huge perks for working for a college or university. Free tuition for yourself and your legal partner, for example. Also, my health insurance is through their work plan which covers most of my transition costs. My orchiectomy, for example, was just a few hundred dollars in copays though it was a $10,000 actual cost.

        Have you considered working for a college or university?

    • #32336

      To Katie:

      Getting Gender Confirmation Surgery, GCS, is a major surgery. I tend to think of any surgery as a risk. When one thinks of needing a surgery one should weigh their life against a chance of possible dismemberment and/or death. Anesthesia is the usual cause of surgical mishap, but there’s many other possibilities.

      I’ve lived four years on HRT and almost two years post-orhiectomy surgery. HRT didn’t affect my penis much. It reduced in size a little. Orchiectomy, however, shrunk it a lot. Maybe by 60%. I live as a the woman I am full time so I’m always using the women’s restrooms. That means I’m sitting down. I’ve noticed it’s more difficult to pee sitting down with a penis, but even harder with a smaller penis.

      I also agree with Skyler that assessing one’s need for a vagina is personal. I would rather have a vagina. It is going to be risky, it will hurt to have done, it will require maintenance like dilating, it will cost me and I will have to convince a surgeon that it’s in my best interests. After all that, however, I think it will help me to be whole, be easier to use the bathroom with, give me a female experience I crave and look better in my clothes.

      Best wishes to you and all others as you weigh the risks and gains against your life!

    • #32337

      I forgot to mention a couple more costs to GCS and these are important to consider when making your final decision. The cost of recovery. GCS will have you recovering for a while. I’ve heard it can take a few weeks to get back up on one’s feet. I’ve also heard it can take a few months to get back to work. Depending on one’s life situation this could have many added costs to take seriously. My partner is disabled. I do the grocery shopping, most of the food prep, house cleaning, getting the mail and any other errands. We may need to hire someone or ask family, chosen family or friends to help us out with that while I’m healing from GCS. Any time off from one’s life activities will need to be planned for as well. I’m returning to college next year. That means all of my educational plans will revolve around GCS and other surgeries like FFS and BA. I would suggest asking other trans ladies, your surgeons and online sites on surgery to get an idea of what your healing time and needs might actually be. I think I’m looking at possibly having a year off from life as I heal from these next three surgeries. Of course, that’s not all at once, but that’s a big chunk of life to pause. I think it’ll be worth it. That decision, however, is personal and only you can decide for yourself.

    • #32338

      Another aspect of GCS to consider is travel plans. I’ve been researching this for the last couple of years. There’s places in the world I’d like to see. Here in America it’s important to note that 45 deleted the Transgender Passport. Now there’s only female and male passports. While here it’s not a major issue, in other countries it could be. Places like Norway, Nigeria, Iran and Saudi Arabia, for example, have very different laws about Transgender folks. If one hasn’t had GCS, yet have their gender corrected/changed on their ID’s may still have many difficulties in those countries and others. From not being able to use the appropriate restroom to being imprisoned or even executed for being a Transgender person. I would say that could make one’s vagina a need if one were in such country! Again, best to do your research as laws change.

    • #32411

      Hi Katie, i agree with you.Β  Eventhough i feel like a woman since i was a teen, i don t think i will get GCS, at least not in the near future. I am however ready to start HRT knowing, most likely, hoping it will give me the curves and shapes of a woman.Β  If my penis shrinks, be it, i only use it to pee.

    • #32476

      Katie,

      I think the question you are asking is if HRT will come with a change of mind on having GCS.Β  That is debatable and I came into this knowing I needed GCS.Β  What I can say is that feeing my mind to accept all of me has left me more open to contemplating other aspects of transition, including sexuality.Β  I’m finally getting to explore being the girl I’ve always been and she had preferences that were repressed right along with her own existence.Β  It’s a journey and comes with lots of contemplation and decisions.Β  Take your time and be certain of what you want to do.

      Hugs, Ambassador Cloe

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