Feeling a little not right

This topic contains 3 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  Traci Smith 2 weeks ago.

  • Creator
    Topic
  • #52400

    Olivia Wolcott
    Participant

    So I went to a support group recently. and a big theme rolled around. everyone kinda knew since they were kids. it made me feel a bit like I wasn’t Transgender enough. I remember thinking as a kid that I wished I was a girl, but my journey to realizing I was transgender has only recently come full circle. so…. what do I do about this weird feeling…. is my path just different? does being transgender look a single perfect way? or no? I’m not doubting I’m transgender really, its just feels weird…

  • Author
    Replies
  • #52556
     Traci Smith 
    Participant

    FREE

    Hi, Traci here. I think that being in a support group setting everyone feels a little out of place at first. Lets face it, you are in a group of strangers.  Wondering if you fit in and imaging that everyone is looking at you. Be yourself, they are only strangers till you get to know them and most everyone of them probably felt the same way their first time. I am just starting HRT on the 11th, and I felt that same feeling when i made my first appointment with the clinic. I showed up for my appointment and did all the exams and bloodwork, was terrified of what the male nurses all thought. One even said so your wanting an HRT appointment? I replied yes and he said alright then, lets get you setup then. He also commented that I have a Diane Sawyer look. A total lie obviously, but i know he was trying to make me feel at ease. The point being. Who cares what others do or dont think of you. The only person that matters is you.

  • #52402
     Marianne Tornander 
    Ambassador

    AMBASSADOR - EDITOR

    Dear Olivia,

    There is no true way to be transgender. Every path differ from the other though with many common points. You are far from alone being a ‘late bloomer’ and also the degree of dysphoria or suffering show large varieties. I have wanted to be a girl and a woman since early childhood, yet I have had a good and fruitful life as a man, husband and father. Now at 54 years of age I feel the time has come to make a decision about how l am to live the rest of my life, and so I am contacting a gender clinic to apply for a gender identity evaluation and possible transition.

    1 user thanked author for this post.
  • #52401
     Cassandra Murphy 
    Participant

    FREE

    Olivia –

    Transgender is a spectrum, or continuum, not a single point.

    Two examples from my personal experience to illustrate –

    I have a friend who transitioned over 25 years ago, at about age 50. She says she had the classic “I’m a woman trapped in a male body” feelings all her life. She was diagnosed with gender dysphoria, the term in general use at that time. She has since had HT, electrolysis, and full SRS. She was, and still is, married.

    I, on the other hand, although crossdressing, and wishing/fantasizing that I was a girl beginning at around age seven, didn’t have my “aha!” moment until I was in my late sixties. And I’ve never had the “I’m trapped” feelings  others report. I am currently receiving HT to treat an “endocrine disorder”, and am presently labeled as “gender incongruent”, a new term for the same phenomenon. I began HT and electrolysis this year, and will start voice coaching soon. Some kind of bottom surgery is probably in my future. I was married for 28 years, until my wife died, and now am in an excellent “friends with benefits” relationship.

    Both my friend and I are certain we’re on the right course.

    So, my advice is: don’t worry about being “trans enough” – you are.

    Feel free to PM me with any questions.

    1 user thanked author for this post.

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