- This topic has 17 replies, 7 voices, and was last updated 2 years ago by Erin.
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- August 17, 2021 at 6:33 pm #117065
Hi everyone i recently sort thearpy im seeing a therapist now she is the only one who knows my real self and encourages me to embrace myself i now know I identify as female. I know its a long journey im just tired of repressing my feelings and trying to live a masculine life. Any advice how i can embrace my feminintity .
- August 17, 2021 at 7:34 pm #117069
As a life long CD only my wife knew. I lost her to cancer in 1996 that left me alone with two daughters age 17 and age 13. So there I was, after a 19 year marriage with only my wife knowing suddenly a single father. The closet became my very best friend. Kept all my femme things hidden. Got a storage unit to store them in . Whenever the daughters were gone I would dress and be Elayne instead of Ted. It was a challenging time for sure. BUT YOU are your own best friend . !! Believe in yourself. After the girls went off to college and i was now on my own i was free to be me. Moved to another location and for many years lived a single life and dressed and dated when and where I could. But remember this to thine own self be true. . The secrete is hard to keep but you can do it . i have always said i was strong enough for TWO PEOPLE Ted and Elayne..
- August 17, 2021 at 8:41 pm #117071
Thank you Elyane for your encourging words sorry for your lost must of been hard
- August 17, 2021 at 9:20 pm #117072
There are likely many different ways to embrace your beautiful femininity…for me, once I was certain that’s what I wanted to do. I made a wish list (go to a bar and be correctly gendered, take belly dancing lessons…I let my imagination run wild. Then I made a regret list: all the things, I felt sad that I missed in high school and college, ex: prom gown, cheerleading, sorority, etc. And little by little I worked my way through some of the lists in small ways. I will never go to prom as a woman, but I bought a pretty gown and danced around in it all night, to some of my favorite prom songs. Some of the things I flat out ignored (I did not become a cheerleader, LOL!) The whole exercise took months, but that time went by so quickly and it was an ecstatic and healing experience. I don’t know if that helps you, but I hope so!
- August 17, 2021 at 9:40 pm #117074
Thank you cj what a wonderful idea . Did you take pictures of your prom dress . I love the idea of a regret list and trying to relive it in your true self .
- August 18, 2021 at 4:16 am #117081
I have enough regrets, the last thing this girl needs to do is list and focus on them! Not so sure on this one, but different people think different thoughts❤️ I have found that there are many moments during the day that one can feel femme. Just a glance down at my smooth, tanned legs can take me out of the male moment and allows me to just enjoy the femme image of those legs in front of me. It can be a lonely place as all we want is for our female self to be acknowledged, recognized, loved. Good luck on your journey…
Haley😘
- August 18, 2021 at 7:04 am #117083
Thank you Haley im thinking maybe wearing a cute or sexy pair of panties under my male cholthes just knowing and feeling them may give me some embacing
- August 29, 2021 at 8:40 pm #117671
Hi and apologies for the delayed response, I haven’t been on this site in a minute! I did take selfies of my prom dress at the time, but I eventually deleted them…that was the very beginning of my transition and certain things were and sometimes about my face and body (nose, shoulder width) are still are very upsetting to look at. But you’re right it was really fun. And trying to fill in the regrets of what I missed out on, raised my default happiness level, lifted a lot of depression and gave me self confidence. I felt more like a real person and less hollow, if that makes sense?
- August 19, 2021 at 1:58 pm #117131
Jennifer:
You found us! Very Good!
Seeking out a therapist is a very good 1st step. It can really help to begin to understand where things sit for you and how to plot a course forward. Also, know that physical transitioning isn’t the end goal for every trans person. We are all different in our perspectives, needs, expectations, etc.
Thanks for completing your Profile page. It helps other members to understand you better. You can update it at any time if anything changes.
If you would like to search for other members, click on Social in the menu and than Member Directory.
- August 19, 2021 at 2:23 pm #117133
Thank you Deann everyone here is so supportive
- August 30, 2021 at 9:57 pm #117694
As you read through the stories of folks here, you will notice that while no two stories are the same, there are common elements. One of those common elements is the process of coming out. The concept is the same, but the implementation varies greatly. When you get to this point, the process has to work for you.
The same thought relates to how we go about our journey. The pace at which we progress will be different. There is great variance in our family situations, our work situations, our needs, our locations, the kind of acceptance we get, the support around us, etc. There are many variables here and Your Mileage May Vary.
And, you are quite correct to use the term journey. It is important to remember that it took 55 years to get to this point. Making the changes and adjustments that we need to make is not the work of a minute and requires our full attention.
- September 3, 2021 at 2:12 pm #117767
I am in the same boat. My wife won’t allow it and denies I am trans. I’ve started HRT so it will be obvious soon enough
- September 3, 2021 at 5:49 pm #117770
Hi erin thats great that you started hrt hope all goes well would love to hear about your journey
Jennifer
- September 5, 2021 at 1:16 pm #117837
Hi Jennifer,
Welcome to our wonderful, accepting, loving, helpful community where you can be safe and be yourself.
You can read about the knowledge and experiances of others on a similar path by reading articles and in the forums and chatting in chat rooms.
My hope is that you will become comfortable here and make many new friends.======== TGH Membership PLANS ===================
https://transgenderheaven.com/choose-your-plan/#link_acc-1-3-d=========== TGH How-to Navigation ============================
https://transgenderheaven.com/forums/topic/member-howto-for-navigating-the-tgh-website/Glad you are here. Looking forward to more sharing,
Regards,
Terri Anne, Ambassador - September 12, 2021 at 3:27 pm #118159
Jennifer:
One thing that I forgot to mention concerns support groups. Given how things are still going with the virus, many support groups have switched to virtual formats for their gatherings. You may be able to connect with one relatively easily and that does 2 things. Knowing that there are others dealing with similar issues can help reduce the isolation that many feel. It can also help to connect you to the larger local, or nearby, community of trans and gender non-conforming folks. Both of these can help to round out your life from a social standpoint…
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