- November 25, 2019 at 4:55 am #53550Stephanie GreenParticipant
Hi! I’m Stephanie. I’m a new member here. I’ve been a member of Crossdresser Heaven for a while. Some of you may have seen my posts or chatted with me there. I’m not sure that I really am a transgender. I want to learn more about what makes one transgender and decide if I am or not.
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- November 28, 2019 at 7:11 pm #53598
Hi Stephanie, Welcome to TGH and the difference between Crossdressers and Transgender people is really simple. A Crossdresser wears the clothing of the opposite sex for sexual gratification, or because they are expressing themselves in this manner to satisfy an emotional need, or they simply enjoy wearing the clothing.
Transgender people feel their gender does not match their body and present themselves as they feel they are. I my case, I never liked my male body parts and felt more comfortable living and presenting as a female. Early on, my crossdressing was never based on anything but comfort and how I saw myself. Transgender people have also taken steps towards some degree, if not fully, transitioning. You may have started electrolysis or HRT, or done breast augmentation. I know that transgender has become an umbrella term including CDer’s, but personally, I am more specific.
I’m not sure by simply joining TGH you will understand whether you want to transition or not but it is a start and I’m sure you will get help here with any questions and/or concerns. And if I can help, feel free to message me anytime.
- November 28, 2019 at 10:38 pm #53601
Thanks, Breanna. I understand what you’re saying. So, is it possible for someone to start cross-dressing and later become transgender? When, where and/or how does that happen? I ask that rhetorically. I don’t expect you to have the answers. If you have any ideas though, feel free to respond.
- November 29, 2019 at 9:11 am #53603
To answer your question, yes, I believe someone can start x-dressing and eventually decide to transition. I believe the physical act of crossdressing may satisfy, for a period of time, deep rooted desires to be a person of the opposite gender. But as time goes by, the individual may no longer feel satisfied with only dressing, but must become that gender.
My journey, I put on my first dress when I was just 5 years old, and told my Mom that I was really a girl. I always knew deep down that I felt more female than I did male. In my teens, I got a job after school and purchased a small feminine wardrobe and I would dress up and walk around my neighborhood. In my twenties I lived as a female for about 2 years but still considered myself the only x-dresser in the world. (No internet). Next, I stopped crossdressing for 23 years and focused on being a man and this was probably the worst period in my life. Finally, at 55 y/o I began remembering my past, one year ago I found CDH and hit the stores. I went out in public almost immediately once I started crossdressing again and the idea of transitioning to a female returned to me. I knew all along, all those years, that I felt like a female in a very male body. I can remember the first successful SRS performed in America where the patient was able to have, a feel, sexual intercourse. I remember that I wanted that surgery but alcohol and heroin addiction got the best of me and I got way off track for many years.
So, if you are considering SRS, or even a partial transition, I strongly suggest you first see a good gender therapist, someone who specializes in CD/TG/TS people and first understand the surgery and what is involved and how the process works. There are some of the best SRS surgeons in Thailand, transgender surgery capital of the world, and I suggest you may want to set up a consultation with one to get the full medical picture.
And, be absolutely sure transition is what you want//need to be happy with yourself. Transitioning does not change who you are as a person, your personality does not change. HRT is not going to make you a woman although after you have been on it awhile, you may become more emotional. This is a huge step in your life so please be sure transition is what you want. And remember, you don’t have to change everything!!
- November 29, 2019 at 9:55 pm #53606
Thanks for the advice, Breanna. I certainly won’t rush into anything.
- November 27, 2019 at 7:20 am #53585
hope this helps you out. i googled what is the difference between x dresser and transgender The difference is that one (transgender) is a sexual orientation and by that I mean you realize you are in the wrong body, you wake up every day and you as a woman are frustrated to see breast protruding from your chest, very feminine features. Or wake up as a man and see a flat chest, men clothing is not as appealing, nothing is interesting.
<p class=”ui_qtext_para u-ltr u-text-align–start”>A cross-dresser (what I am) is someone who is in touch with either masculinity or femininity without feeling like changing anything on their body. Sure some cross-dressers go to the extremes of making minor changes to have a gender neutral face, or keep a rigid diet to have a gender neutral body. But that’s about it. In my case I am bisexual, I love women and I love men too, growing up I loved cross-dressing, then hated it, and loved it again. It’s pretty hard for a bisexual to accept femininity at least for me that was my case. Being a cross-dresser means that for me is just clothes, I would love the full makeup, with a sexy female outfit, when I go out as a man, I want to look equally flashy as a man.</p>
<p class=”ui_qtext_para u-ltr u-text-align–start”>As mentioned in some of my past responses, there are reasons why some cross-dressers stay on the shore and don’t go swim deep and that is because cross-dressing is a very expensive life. In 2018 I spent nearly U$ 500 in feminine items including wig and makeup. So you have to buy clothes if you don’t want to use someone else’s style, then if you have other hobbies such as fishing, gaming you spend money on that too, if you are in a relationship with a female then is the perfect excuse to get subscriptions to fashion and style magazines while you read them too. Sure not all cross-dressers would like to go all female some just like the sensation of panties or other undergarment but in some cases the fear or diving deep and ending up buying for two is a reason not to dive deep into cross-dressing.</p>
- November 27, 2019 at 8:43 pm #53593
Thanks for the information, Lucinda.
- November 27, 2019 at 7:16 am #53584
- November 26, 2019 at 5:10 am #53572
hello Stephanie nice to have you here on T.G.H. i am not in your area, but what makes us cross dress is a good question? for me its the clothing and feel of it. i look more female then male when dressed up. i feel less depressed, stress free in a way. no panic attacks. plus i started at a young age wearing tights for a school play i was hooked, from there i wanted to try on a dress then more and more. now in my 50s i have my own collection of dresses, some skirts, tons of colored nylons, bras, panties and even pads, make up, wig heels nail polish, perfume. i wear my own now for wife did not like me wearing hers. she knows of my x dressing and lets me dress up when no other adult child still at home is out at work for 4 to 6 hours. but wife will not help with make up or let me sit in same room as her. she has seen me getting dressed up. i under dress a lot during the winter. some people x dress for the reason they feel that they are in the wrong body, some have a slip personality disorder shell i call it. there is a lot of members here and on C.D.H that came to this site and came out some are out of the closet and in public dressed up and good for them. wish i could get out of the closet i would feel more comfortable and showing my true side of me and talking to others that do go out dressed up. woman dress in manly cloths all day long, so why can;t we dress up in female cloths. its only cloths to hide out nude body, who is to say what is male cloths and what is female cloths any ways. the style and color and fabric. so what we wear dresses and skirts and blouses, nylons. its the way we feel about our self’s.
- November 26, 2019 at 7:44 pm #53581
Thanks for your comments, Lucinda. Just to be clear, I know that I am a cross-dresser. I’m not sure if I am transgender. Are cross-dressers automatically transgender? That is what I want to know.
- November 29, 2019 at 9:21 am #53604
Just because you crossdress, that does not mean your transgender or you will become transgender. People have begun using the label, transgender, to include all types of sexual variations. However, according to my doctor who’s doing my surgery, a crossdresser is a crossdresser, transgender people are taking steps to change/alter their gender because they feel they were born with the wrong genitals. Transexuals are people who have completed transition. I agree with my doctor’s viewpoints and use these labels as stated. Good Luck!
- November 25, 2019 at 5:20 am #53551
While I hope to make as many friends as possible, I would especially like to meet girls from my area so we could meet in person. Please let me know if you are in southeastern Michigan.
- November 29, 2019 at 10:15 am #53605
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