I feel so vindicated

  • Creator
  • #119971
    Melanie Penson

    Hello Folks


    I work for a charity in the UK, I’ve been there for 21 years and am now one of the four longest serving members. In Feb 2020, I came out as a trans woman. I was very nervous at first but I needn’t have been as I was so lovingly accepted as Melanie, Woman.

    Last month, we had a new chairman foisted upon us and he came to his first Branch Meeting. He had painstakingly instructed my manager on how to make name badges so he’d know who we were. Mine said Melanie in big bold black letters.

    After a brief introduction, he looked me right in my eyes and said “only your name isn’t really Melanie is it” no question mark and very accustory and aggressively. I don’t know how I held myself together for the rest of that 6 hour meeting.

    Us girls had a group hug in the car park after it was over. I made a formal complaint which was carried straight to our CEO, who is female and wonderfully supportive. I was trembling just before my phone interview as part of the investigation, had to go pee a dozen times. Yes, I did have a cry.

    I must say, I’ve been overwhelmed with the level of support I’ve received: texts, emails and phone calls. It turns out this new chairman has come from a background of big business and thinks we should all be like him! No Way! He turned on someone who questioned him and he labelled them “dsylexic” for not agreeing with him and called one of our founder members “just a tea lady, who cares what you think”.

    I shall find out next week the outcome of the investigation. I feel empowered now I’ve had the courage to stand up for myself ( and others). The whole committee will refuse to work under him. I feel like saying “take that, entitled attitude and white male priviledge!”.

    I had a lovely girly night out last Thursday and I decided to dress up: black dress and heeled boots with a lacy basque and suspenders (garters) underneath. I felt so deliciously feminine and we had a great time.

    I feel that I’ve made huge strides further on my journey into womanhood, leaving my troubled male past even further behind. I am so grateful that I have such a wonderful, supportive circle of friends, I’m really feeling their love.

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  • Author
    • #119977
      DeeAnn Hopings


      It is those moments that only serve to galvanize our resolve. The opposition doesn’t understand that simple fact. I would hope that there is a way to “free up that person’s future”, aka The Sack, as I believe you say…

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      • #119978

        I shall find out sometime next week but if the entire committee refuse to work with him, what else can he do?

        There are rumblings of a Motion of No Confidence that I think there’ll be a stampede to sign. The more this guy digs his heels in, the more embarrasing it will be for him. Our membership have to ratify his position at our AGM and what’s the betting they won’t after they’ve heard about his actions?

        We also have a plaque of past chair people from our founding in 1989;

        Chairman 1: 1989 to 2000

        Chairman 2: 2000 to 2014

        Chairman 3: 2014 to 2020 ( had to stand down due to ill health)

        Nasty transphobic chairman: 2 months!

        The words ” how the mighty have fallen” spring to mind.


        • #119981
          DeeAnn Hopings

          Or perhaps…

          “Idiot shots himself in the foot once again… Has few toes left…

    • #119972
      Michelle Lawson

      Melanie, good for you. And I’m sure it will work out just fine. And, it doesn’t matter who the person is, their skin colour, how short or tall, large of small, or how many fingers of toes they have; you will encounter mean spirited people along the way. I have given up on trying to label anyone past the identifier (name) they wish to be known as, otherwise I feel I will slip into the same boat they are when they refer to transgender people in a derogatory manner.

      And working for a charity must do wonders for you. Giving back to others is never a bad thing. Giving back be it your time or treasure is something everyone should do more of. If you wish, message me with some info on your charity and I’ll see if it is something we could list in our Local Places directory.


      Hugs, Michelle

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